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02-26-2012, 09:31 PM | #1 |
Banned
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: South Texas RIO GRANDE VALLEY
Posts: 11,700
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Had to run some errands in next town on my only day off. It sucked w the exception had my wife running with me so was not driving solo and at one stop found 20 bucks in the parking lot at Wal Mart, right after I put gas. Went to kill time to run another errand so the wife and I went all over the area where I needed to be. Well we both got kinda hungry and we knew we were gonna have dinner soon so we stopped in a donut shop for a quick snack. 2 people came to ring up order a bearded dude and a big girl who looked like her tooth was popping out to one side. The girl took our order and we got our donuts and drinks, as soon as I finished I asked for the restroom to wash my hands from sugar on fingertips. As I was leaving and giving my wife the signal lets go, the lady clerk then asked me if my name is Jake. I was confused I asked yeah I am why? She said coldly ya don't remember me? I was still not following she told me her name was Crystal. I then thought I knew 2 Crystals one was a big girl I knew back in 1997, and another in 2002. I asked with a feeling of dread did I know you back in....she replied 10 yrs ago! I felt like Shatner in Star Trek II running into Khan. My response in my head was "DAMN U GOT FAT AND FUGLY!" I responded to her "Wow been 10 yrs I figured u vanished off the face of the planet. She then said coldly and more angry "Yeah u broke up with me!" I then remembered that she was really mean to all my friends and was a money-hungry gold digging bitch; now seeing she was as big as the BAD YEAR BLIMP I said "Yeah had my reasons then and even today more reason to that!" I admit I am no prize but this chick went from looking cute like Jennifer Love Hewitt w/ a smaller figure to the stunt double that played Jason Voorhees in Friday the 13th part 4 big and fugly and would not wish my worst enemy on. I guess after this will be buying donuts in the next town over.
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02-29-2012, 09:29 PM | #2 |
Banned
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: South Texas RIO GRANDE VALLEY
Posts: 11,700
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Followup on that my cousin went to see for himself and he damn near died from seeing her. He said I've seen roadkill more attractive than this....
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02-29-2012, 10:31 PM | #3 |
DDC III
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Sheridan Arkansas
Posts: 1,976
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Thanks for the laugh!
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03-01-2012, 12:32 AM | #4 |
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Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Refrigerated Aisle
Posts: 20,293
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I hate when that happens. But it is sure good for a laugh
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03-01-2012, 01:17 AM | #5 |
Retired Viper
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Markham, ON
Posts: 45,213
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This is the reason I had to leave Facebook. I friended a few ex-girlfriends and a couple have let it go in a bad way. It was hard to explain to my wife that I used to tap that in high school.
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03-01-2012, 01:42 AM | #6 |
Banned
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Refrigerated Aisle
Posts: 20,293
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hahahahaha or tap half of that in high school hohohohoho
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03-01-2012, 09:16 AM | #7 |
Python Patrol
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: J-ville, FL
Posts: 2,118
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Yeah, running into exes always makes my wife question my taste in women. I usually have to explain that it was a long time and 50 lbs ago.
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03-01-2012, 08:48 PM | #8 |
Banned
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: South Texas RIO GRANDE VALLEY
Posts: 11,700
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Quote:
I mean this chick 10 yrs ago went from Ferrari to Beat Up Buick....Again I am no prize, but many of my friends I run into tell me I havent changed. |
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