[Owner of a Lonely B.A.T.]

Okay I'm gonna provide you with reviews for the F13/Jason movies.

I have to note that after part 8 Jason takes Mahatten the property leaves Paramount studios leaving the Friday the 13th moniker and becomes simply Jason (fill in the blank) under new owner New Line Cinemas.


Friday the 13th

Riding high off the sucess of John Carpenters Halloween, and (both) cloning heavily from Bob Clark's Black Christmas director Sean Cunnimgham gives us Friday the 13th.

Unlike Halloween whos gore was subtle, Friday the 13th amps up the gore to what was at the time unheard of levels in US cinema...with the possible exception of the George Romero classic Night of the Living Dead, but that was mainly at this point still considered a cult film by most.

Friday the 13th tells the tale of some rather premisucous, beer loving camp counselers attempting to reopen Camp Crystal Lake, a camp that has a history of issues, including a boy drowning, water going bad, some fires, and even two counselers being murdered.

Despite warnings from the colorful locals, including Crazy Ralph, the old man prophet of doom himself, young couselers still arrive.

One by one they are dispatched by various means. Arrow through the throat, ax to the head, you get the point. Until only Alice remains. In attempting to escape from the yet as unseen killer, she bumps into a late arriving counseler, Mrs. Pamela Voorhees.

Mrs. Voorhees is a bit unstable, to say the least.

She recants the horrors that has been seen on this site, and lingers on the drowning of the young boy....her son. It seems the counselers were too busy making love to be watching young Jason that day.

Mrs. Voorhees in her grief, hears Jason's voice in her head, and it drives her to kill the counselers.

A fight ensues, and Pamela is beheaded on the beach by Alice with a machete.

In what is perhaps the oddest moment in movie history she decides to take a boat ride on the lake. One might argue the with the stress of that night she was slllllllightly out of her mind, when doing so, but it sets up the next day very nicely, where she awakes on the boat to see the police on shore trying to get her to come on in.

All seems well until, young deformed retarded Jason pulls Alice into the lake. A homage of sorts to Brian DePalma's Carrie.

Alice is seen later recovering in the hospital, the sole survivor, she asks what happpened to the boy that dragged her in the lake.

The police didn't find a boy.

Alice leaves us with the ominous warning, "Then he's still out there."





Overall well done, one of the better of it's kind. The suspence builds nicely throughout the movie, and I sorta doubt most seeing this for the first time will suspect Mrs Vorhees until the reveal, which if you watch it carefully is a pretty sad story. A mother's grief is so overpowering that she starts avenging her son by killing anyone that fits the profile of those responsible for his death.

I highly recommend this movie.

I will note a few things, by todays (SAW and such) standards this movie is a bit tame. I still believe it stands the test of time, it's just that todays fans have seen it all now, so this may seem sorta tame.

[Owner of a Lonely B.A.T.]

Friday the 13th part 2:

Picking up where part one left off, but new counselers are opening a new camp on the same lake.

We get a quick trip for Jason to dispatch Alice the survivor from part 1, and off we go!!!!!

Jason hacks his way through a whole slew of new, and ready to get naked young folk, leaving just Paul and Ginny to fend him off.

Ginny at one point stumbles onto Jason's shack, and his alter of sorts with good ol Mom's head! Using some psycology she dresses as Mom and give Jason his reward for a job well done......a machete through his shoulder!

But our boy and down and out yet!

He comes back and attacks again for one last scare by smashing through a plate glass window! Machete still lodged in his shoulder....that is testicular fortitude.

The next morning Ginny is the sole survivor of the rampage....where did Paul go? We never see him get killed. (In reality the actor quit before filming was complete).



The movie is a very close copy of the original, with just enough twists to keep you interested. Probably just as good as part one. Amy Steel's performance as Ginny is likely the highlight, as she presents a victum of Jason's that is smart, something rarely seen in horror movies, until more recently women were portrayed as being dragged along by a man attempting to rescue them. Amy's Ginny seems like she just might make it through the night.

Again I'd recommend this one as well.

[Owner of a Lonely B.A.T.]

Friday the 13th Part III in 3-D

Wow does a movie franchise slide part three is an okay movie, but for me marks the beginning of the downslide, filmed partially in 3D, a gimmick that has long since lost it's appeal. It picks up the next day after the events of part II, techically not making it Friday the 13th. Part two was at least a few years after part one. Seeing as how Jason was a boy then, but is at least of adult age by part two.....beging the question why would Alice from part one stay near the town where she knew Jason would be?

III gives us an odd techno disco theme music, which is damn funny.

The plot?

Hey who cares really, old friends, farm house, fat annoying kid (possibly the first time fans of the series started to want Jason to kill), there's alot of slaughtering here.

One of the best things is Jason finally picks up his iconic Hockey mask, hard to believe three movies into the series that something so well associated with Jason would finally make it's appearence, but none the less it does.

There's a bizarre subplot our herione Chris was previously attacked by Jason years prior.

Also what makes little sense is what happened to Jason's pretty serious machete wound from part two.

Anyway Jason stalks and kills nearly all except for Chris who puts an ax in Jason's head...he keeps coming by the way, and eventually she hangs him, presumably killing the big guy.

Again in what is completely an odd move Chris too decides a nice quiet boot trip is just what is needed to relax. Only this time we can be certain she's outta her mind! As we see some hallucinations, like a rotting Mrs Voorhees corpse drag her into the lake!

We last see her laughing histerically as she is hauled away to the wackoshack in the back seat of the police cruiser.

Not a big fan of this movie, it's watchable, but the techno music begining, and lack of continuous plot, really annoy me. As does the 3D. An okay story of set by gimmicks and some bad plot turns.

[Owner of a Lonely B.A.T.]

Friday the 13th part 4: The Final Chapter

Don't bet on it.

Mrs Voorhees baby boy is presummed dead, and taken to the morgue, where he promtly defies medical knowledge and kills his way back to his beloved forrest.

Hey does Jason's love to keep the forrest of limits to intruders count as being eco-positive?

Just a thought.

Anyway a step up from part III as the ditch the techno and 3D, but by now the characters are starting to blend together.

For those that can't stand Crispen Glover this is your chance to see him die horrorably.

But for the most part more of the same thing, except this time we are treated to the death of Jason....no really we are.

Yeah I know he has been drown, and machette'd and axed, and stabbed, and beaten, and hung and even declaired dead, but this time it's for real!

A young lad Tommy Jarvis (played by everyone's favorite child star turned Hollywood screw up Corey Feldman) puts a machete right through his Jason's crazy head!

Ain't no way he can recover from that!

It's finally over.

But as Tommy opens his crazed eyes, your left with the question is it over?


Not a bad flick, it definately has it's high points, a few low as well, but it had the novelty of having been promoted as the last of the series.

Needless to say it was not.

This is the first of what is considered the Tommy Javis trilogy.

[Owner of a Lonely B.A.T.]

Friday the 13th part 5: A New Beginning

Young Tommy has had some issues since we last seen him.

Mental issues.

He's grown some, (ie he's not played by the Feldmeister anymore) he's a teen now, and is sent to a sort of halfway house for troubled teens. Yeah a funny farm on an actual farm, that made me laugh too.

Anyway it's not exactly the most stable environment as on patient kills another with an ax shortly after Tommy arrives. Heh the fat kid wouldn't shut up about his chocolate bars what would you have done?

Anyway Jason shows up and starts offing people again, but Tommy who is suspiciously silent seems to always be missing when it happens.

Is he pulling a Clark Kent? But with dcapitaions...
Has Jason messed Tommy up so bad that he's assumed Jason's role?

Well the answer is no.

Turns out the fat kid that got hacked up was the son of the ambulence driver that came to pick up his body, and he decided to dress as Jason and kill everyone else.

But at the end we are yet again left to wonder has Tommy NOW gone over the edge, will he be the next Jason?

Ugh very lack luster movie, crazed hillbillies, menatlly challenged having sex, and Faux Jason....unless your adament about seeing this or a fan of mentally challenged sex scenes, you should likely pass.

[Owner of a Lonely B.A.T.]

Friday the 13th part 6: Jason Lives

I'd like to take this time to thank director Tom McLoughlin.

You single handedly took a good franchise that was knee deep in aweful crap, and saved it!

What's cooler then Jason being an unstoppable retarded killing machine?

Jason being a Unstoppable Retarded ZOMBIE Killing Machine!

Tommy Javis, now in his twenties, engages on a quest to rid the world of Jason Voorhees.....ugh isn't he dead?

Yeah Tommy may be better then when we last saw him, but he ain't all that better.

Anyway he digs up Jason's body in an attempt to cremate it, with the help of Horshack (of tv's Welcome Back Kotter).

And goes a little bonkers as he ris part of the metal fench off and proceeds to get Medevil on his corpse. He stabs it repeatedly, but calms down a bit leaving the pole in the corpses chest.

Opps lightning hits the pole.

And like Frankenstein's monster JASON IS BACK!

Maggots and all on his face!

Actually this movie pretty much rocks, Jason has never been cooler, or more blood thirsty.

The plot is great, the killings are interesting, and something rare in a horror flick, there is some good comedy. Not over the top, just subtle enough to make it worth while.

As Jason stalks camp counselors at a kids summer camp one kid asks another, "So what did you wann be when you grew up?"

or

After Jason is resurrected, the cemetery caretaker reburies him, (it's really Horshack's body, but he doesn't know that...he drinks alot), when he's done he turns right to the camera and says, "Why did they have to go and dig up Jason...some people have a strange idea of entertainment."

Good stuff, I highly recommend it!

[Owner of a Lonely B.A.T.]

Friday the 13th part 7: The New Blood

Again a decent entry in the series.

Take Jason, and have him fight Carrie.

That was the basic idea, and as far as I'm concerned the seed that would later spring Freddy VS Jason.

Jason was yet again killed at the end of the last flick having been chained to a rock, and his throat cut by the propellers of a boat motor in the middle of Crystal Lake.

But many years earlier (pressumably while Jason was dead) a young girl witnesses her mother being beaten by her father at the lake. She goes off in a boat....what is it with boats in these flicks....they do not solve all of lifes problems...as her father tries to appolgize to his daughter from the dock her psychic abilities kick and and she unleashes a blast that destroys the dock, and kills dad.

Many years later she and her mother and her therapist return to the lake, the doctor is trying hard to foce Tina into using her abilities, and he hopes coming back here will trigger them. He cares less about her, and more about her abilities.

Any way Tina in a fit of frustration with the Doc takes a boat ride.....again....and uses her powers to hopefully bring Dad back......opps instead we get Jason back. See I warned you about the boat trips.

Jason looks cooler than ever now, bones exposed, and all when he is unmasked he barely looks human at this point.

Anyway Jason and Tina do battle after Jason slaughters damn near everyone. Tina even blows the house up to try and stop Jason, but he corners Tina and her would be boyfriend on the dock.

Only now Daddy pops outta the water and pulls Jason in!

There really is no resultion to this as we leave the movie. Was Daddy real? I doubt it, I tend to believe it was simply Tina using a manifestation of her powers to stop Jason.


A pretty decent movie, if you can over look Daddy popping from the water.

I recommend it.

[Owner of a Lonely B.A.T.]

Friday the 13th part 8: Jason Takes Mahatten


Drek, pure soupy drek.

Jason is resurrected by means of an exposed underwater power cable, and climbs aboard a graduation cruise ship....which is the scummiest cruise ship your likely to see.

He spends most of the movie offing people on the ship, odd considering he's supposed to be in Manhatten.

Not really odd when you consider Paramount pretty much slashed the budget of the film in half, after green lighting it. See F13 movies had been lossing money left and right, and they knew that they were either gonna onload the property, on someone else, or completely stop making flicks all together.

The result.....Jason Takes Manhatten gets one day to film in the big apple.

Meaning the majority of the flick is on the less expensive boat sets, or alley sets as opposed to the on location shoots.

None of that would have helped. This idea was a dead on turkey. I understand that the concept was to give fans something new, and fresh. Pulling Jason from his woods and dropping him in NYC was it, and that was effectively castrated.

Jason plods through charcter after character both on the boat, and in faux NYC.

The chase ends in the NYC sewars where Jason gets dowsed with toxic waste....apparently the makers of the film would like you to suspend belief completely at this point, and believe that NYC sewars are cleaned every midnight by flushing toxic waste through them.......and wait.......it turns Jason back into a boy!



BAD, BAD, BAD.

Nothing good to see here move along.

But if you ever have a chance to see the bonus disc of the F13 box DVD set view the preview of this flick.

NYC skyline.......Frank's 'New York, New York' starts playing.... we close in on the water front.... and see a lone figure.... his back towards the camera......he turns to reveal......JASON!

Funny as hell!

[bluebikerboy1]

i always liked jason flicks. they never really scared me per say. thy were just great hack n slash films

[Owner of a Lonely B.A.T.]

At this point New Line Cinema takes over the property, and gives it back to the director of the first flick Sean Cunningham.

Cunningham remains as producer, but turns day to day operations to his nephew, Noel Cunningham.

His two main directives? Wrap this series up, and get that stupid hocky mask outta my film.

Jason Goes to Hell was billed as the Final Friday.

As such and armed with the two directives the writers did what the could.

They blew Jason up.

Literally. Instead of the familar image of a hock masked machete wielding manic Jason was literally blown up. The chunks including his heart go to the FBI's coroner, who becomes......a little obsessed with the black heart of Jason Voorhees......and he eats it.

No joke.

Which turns him into Jason.....sorta.....he still looks the same, with the exception of the blood trails by his mouth, but now Jason's essense has control of the body.

It sounds as bad as it is.

He then proceeds to jump from body to body via a heart vomit into his next victims mouth transfer.

There's some clap trap about a bounty hunter tracking Jason, and that he can only be reborn via another Voorhees woman, and a mystical dagger that can send Jason to hell.

Ugh long story short, Jason gets reborn.....full grown, hockey mask and all and completely messed up. There's a fight, and the mystical dagger becomes a sword and is plunged into Jason. Rays of light and large stone hands......your not imagining that LARGE STONE HANDS, pull Jason under the ground pressumably to hell. Leaving only his mask.


That should be it, but in what was meant as a joke from one New Line Property, to another, Freddy Krueger's gloved knife hand comes from the ground and drags the mask beneath the ground.


Again, pretty bad. With the peramiters set, the makers did what they could to provide the audience with something they had never done before in a F13 movie which was add a level of mystic to the series.

It was bad.

Avoid unless you a a serious hard core fan.....and yes I still watch it.....I watch even the worst of these movies regularly.