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12-19-2010, 04:02 PM | #31 |
Banned
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Boston, MA
Posts: 19,093
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I think there is something going on
She has continued to talk smack and I haven't said or done anything. |
12-19-2010, 04:28 PM | #32 |
Hisstank Ninja
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Mint on Card
Posts: 8,956
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Things go awry when marriage ceases to be about serving your spouse, and instead becomes a cost-benefit analysis.
Ask yourself what true love requires - patience, kindness, selflessness, and seeking the good of the other. That doesn't necessarily mean being a push-over, it might mean you need to make her understand how wrong she is, or that your marriage needs some professional help. But whatever the case, make sure you're looking at it from the perspective of what's best for your wife, not what you're getting out of it.
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12-19-2010, 04:38 PM | #33 |
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Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: North Jersey
Posts: 10,454
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Quote:
There is an imbalance and you probably walk a very thin line without setting it off. The fact that you called her out on things that bothered you....have made you the ultimate villian. She probably thinks when you go away, when work goes away, the kids go away...she'll feel better. She won't until you get to the root of the problem. 3 years, 3 kids that weren't mine and chasing an ex bf through 2 towns to let him know if he came back and played with her head I'd kill him...didn't solve my problem. You need professional help here before you end up walking away and wondering for years later..."What did I ever do to her to deserve this?" |
12-19-2010, 04:42 PM | #34 |
Banned
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Boston, MA
Posts: 19,093
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Oddly enough we HAVE gone to counseling. However, I didn't really think much of the doctor as according to her, she couldn't understand what our problem was and why we were there. She thought we had a rather healthy relationship
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12-19-2010, 04:43 PM | #35 |
Banned
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Boston, MA
Posts: 19,093
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Quote:
Things go awry when marriage ceases to be about serving your spouse, and instead becomes a cost-benefit analysis.
Ask yourself what true love requires - patience, kindness, selflessness, and seeking the good of the other. That doesn't necessarily mean being a push-over, it might mean you need to make her understand how wrong she is, or that your marriage needs some professional help. But whatever the case, make sure you're looking at it from the perspective of what's best for your wife, not what you're getting out of it. |
12-19-2010, 04:50 PM | #36 |
Hisstank Ninja
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Mint on Card
Posts: 8,956
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thanks.
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12-19-2010, 09:35 PM | #37 |
Crimson Guard
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Toronto, Canada
Posts: 1,045
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Sorry to hear of your troubles. Hope it settles soon. My best friend has the same problem. He slept in his car for a week! His wife has turned into his mother. Nag nag nag. Whine whine whine. He works extra days per month by choice to avoid the family drama.
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12-19-2010, 10:26 PM | #38 |
Banned
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: North Jersey
Posts: 10,454
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Quote:
Look, I'm gonna be dead serious here. EVERYTHING that you are saying is EXACTLY what I went through. My GF was bipolar and there were times her mood was so severe that I could barely do anything without her freaking out on me. 1 minute she would want to go out, the next she had absolutley no will to do anything. Sometimes she was happy to see me...other times she would lay on her stomach with her face burried in the pilow and ignore me when I would talk to her. She needed to be medicated....she still refuses, and she's still an incredibly irrational person to deal with. Which is why I havent had contact with her in 3 years. She got so bad and made me so nervouse I actually developed acne on my shoulders...when I left, so did the acne. Anyway... We were dating, I left...loss of money and I got my heart broken. I helped raise 3 children but in the end I had to come to terms that they werent mine..wish them the best, kiss em goodbye and leave. In your case...I think it might be a better idea for you to seek some kind of medical professional to see if the root problem is actually stemming from something that is actually "health" related. It took me 4 doctors to find one I liked enough to fix my shoulder....find a better Dr and save your relationship. I wish you the best of luck and if you need to vent, drop a line. |
12-19-2010, 11:24 PM | #39 |
Banned
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: New Hampster
Posts: 4,505
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Sounds like my last two months. AND she wont leave ><
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