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06-03-2010, 10:17 PM | #1 |
Banned
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: North Jersey
Posts: 10,454
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I'll share a new stories of my man-whoring escapades...as usual, most of you will get a laugh out of it, 1 or 2 will bash me...and I'll just say "Giggity"..so here we go.
Like 2 weeks ago I gotta facebook request from this girl. I can see we have some mutual friends, but honestly I had no friggin idea who she was, but I added her on the sole reason that she has a vagina. Turns out she is a friend of a friend etc etc...and remembers me from 2 years ago at my ex-drummer's wedding. She started sending me messages and we starting talking. Then it turned into texting. So she texted me yesterday "I'm getting out late, but if it isn't too late for do you wanna meet for a drink?" Honestly, she's a "6" AT BEST...really more like 5--but she's cool. So I agreed--plus I wanted to watch the Stanley Cup and have a beer..so I did and I meet her at this shithole around 10:30 last night. The Karoke BS was almost unbearable, but we had a good time laughing at drunk people trying to sing...then I noticed when she went to the bathroom she would say "Is this where you're gonna put a roofie in my drink?"..hahaha....nope..I wont need to, that was a dead give away. So a few beers each and we head outside to leave, we're leaning up against her car talking.."did you have fun" etc etc...so I figured ya know what? F it..she's not that bad...let me see what happens. "So I'm gonna kiss you now"--smiling, laughing keeping it light. "Oh yeah? well I...." ok so that happens.. Then we walk back to my car which was parked around the other side of the bulding. One thing leads to another and....let's just say she was "rappin' on the mic"...so she stops and goes "See..now to you I'm always gonna be that girl". I have become some numb to these STUPID remarks that I just reach into the bag of recycled and generic comebacks like "nah..what?? C'mon it's totally...totally cool, you're cool, it's all good." So we square that away and I walk her back to her car, I gave her a hug and a little kiss on her forehead and she goes..."I love being in your arms". Whoa. Reeeeeeeeeeeelax on that! To which I said back "Cool....I gotta go, but text me this weekend or something" So today I got about 50 text messages that all read "You're bad lol" "So what were YOU thinking about today" "Are you always such a bad boy? lol" Here are my answers to that: I wouldn't say I'm "bad" I thought about NBA Finals, G.I.Joe, Slayer and Cheeseburgers. Not always. In the end, I realize one thing in my new found Quagmireness....if you listin to N.W.A. on the way to a "date"--you will be empowerd. Also my N.J. Generals shirt is "lucky"...I have to prove this scientifically. And that chick from my Dr's office NEVER called!!...Now the cycle starts again..... |
06-03-2010, 10:34 PM | #2 |
Crimson Guard
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 3,541
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LOL good for you and watch out she sounds like a clinger
I love your stories they always make me smile as a happily married man i will live through your adventures. Have fun and be safe |
06-03-2010, 10:36 PM | #3 |
Gary Goggles
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: joedeclassified.com/forum/
Posts: 18,094
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Quote:
I no longer love being in your arms.
__________________
JOEDECLASSIFIED.COM
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06-03-2010, 10:40 PM | #4 |
Banned
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: North Jersey
Posts: 10,454
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Quote:
And that is exactly the reason I have turned into the dirty man slut that I am. |
06-03-2010, 10:41 PM | #5 |
Hisstank.Com General
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 12,521
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Lol....good luck with that....
By the way, your band sounds incredible. |
06-03-2010, 10:44 PM | #6 |
Crimson Guard
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Frederick, Maryland
Posts: 2,428
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Your stories are Awesome, there should be a front page "PitViper" section.
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06-03-2010, 10:45 PM | #7 |
Banned
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: North Jersey
Posts: 10,454
|
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06-03-2010, 10:50 PM | #8 |
Hisstank.Com General
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 12,521
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06-03-2010, 10:56 PM | #9 |
Banned
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Boston, MA
Posts: 19,093
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I'm confused
What happened? You cuddled near the car? |
06-03-2010, 11:04 PM | #10 |
Banned
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: North Jersey
Posts: 10,454
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