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Today, 09:16 AM | #66111 |
Epically lazy bastard!
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: My Recliner
Posts: 23,982
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Today, 12:07 PM | #66112 |
Yee Ha!
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 1,273
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Quote:
Trying to motivate my teenage daughter is becoming beyond frustrating. She's extremely book smart, is about to graduate High school with a 3.75 grade point average (all As & Bs). Yet she has zero interest in going to college. I realize college is not for everyone, and it's over priced now. And she has heard the horror stories of student loan debt. But she doesn't currently have a job either, or a driver's license. She also has zero interest in getting her driver's license.
She's already 18. I had my driver's license when I was 16, dual enrolled in college at 17, hell, by age 19 I flew to Brazil by myself. I'm starting to think that we've spoiled her too much, and she's just planning on propping her feet up and mooching off mom and pops for the foreseeable future. I'm struggling to figure out just how strict I should be. On one hand, I want her to work for herself, make her own way, use that big ass brain of hers. But she's my only child, and lord knows I moved back in with my folks briefly in my early 20s. Quote:
My advice: She needs a plan, and needs to sell it to you guys and herself. Sit down and talk about it over the summer.
If she?s moving forward with a plan to move out/better herself, things can remain status quo. If not, it?ll be time to charge rent come SEP; enough rent to encourage her to develop that plan. If you do that, though, give her plenty of time to sink or swim?no surprise ?next week you owe x# dollars.? I was going to charge my daughter rent because she had zero plan, but she decided to take classes at the local community college a week before school started. 1 class in the fall, 2 currently, with plans to take on a staggered 4 (!) over the summer. She?s decided she wants to be a Child Life Specialist (works in hospitals and helps kids understand surgeries on their level, something she has benefitted from many times in her 18 years). If she?s successful, great; if not, back to the drawing board. I just want her to keep moving forward. I feel for you man. I went through a similar ordeal with my daughter several years back and glad that shit's over with. Especially, with the whole driver's license thing. I couldn't understand it then, but soon found out that a lot of driving age kids within at least the last 5-10 years seemed to have very little interest in getting their driver's license. It may have been different in urban areas, but I think a main difference between why we couldn't wait to get ours back then is that it was how we were able to go socialize with other kids and find ways to entertain ourselves. Nowadays, kids socialize mostly through their phones or other online means from the comforts of home, so they are not in a big rush to drive to meet up with friends or much else. Back in the day, almost every town had a strip packed with kids would cruise around on weekends and summer nights. I haven't seen anything remotely close to that in years. I honestly think cell phone/internet access is mostly all the freedom kids want these days. Ozzie gave some great advice on working toward some kind of plan and giving her the summer to think it all over before going into too much of a crackdown mode. Food, shelter, health insurance for her is a given, but anything beyond that is fair game after summer's over. You might ease into it this summer by starting with the "you'll have to start paying for your own phone line" deal first which might expedite the whole need for a driver's license just so she could get a job to start paying for the phone. That might work if she is attached to her phone like mine was, lol. Good luck and try to not be too hard on her or yourself. Shit goes by really quick and before you know it, they've moved out, married and you're a grandpa with a granddaughter and another one on the way, lol.
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Today, 01:12 PM | #66113 |
He Who Remains
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: Florida
Posts: 9,355
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Thanks for the continued advice and support gentlemen. Much appreciated.
Ozzie, I like your advice about taking the summer to develop a plan. Seems obvious, but sometimes obvious stuff isn't always, well, obvious. Readmo, you are certainly correct about this new generation not giving a damn about getting their license. The more parents I talk to, the more I hear that their kids were the same way.
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~~~~~The Late Night Crew~~~~~ Last edited by BeachheadMatt; Today at 01:15 PM.. |
Today, 03:39 PM | #66114 |
Crimson Guard
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Brazil,Rio de janeiro
Posts: 3,005
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Quote:
Thanks for the continued advice and support gentlemen. Much appreciated.
Ozzie, I like your advice about taking the summer to develop a plan. Seems obvious, but sometimes obvious stuff isn't always, well, obvious. Readmo, you are certainly correct about this new generation not giving a damn about getting their license. The more parents I talk to, the more I hear that their kids were the same way. |
Today, 08:34 PM | #66115 |
Crimson Guard
Join Date: Dec 2021
Location: Do I really live?
Posts: 1,965
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MREs! Griff, BeachHeadMatt is trying to motivate his child not get arrested for abuse.
Besides it is the start of Hurricane season. Feeding her real food would be cheaper than MRE's. There is always the pick one of two options go to school or join the military. Hopefully, she picks school.
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