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11-06-2011, 10:23 PM | #1 |
Banned
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: North Jersey
Posts: 10,454
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Let me preface this by saying there will be no mention of boobs, sex, bodily fluids or overall R rated subject matter. Which means Lody, and about 90% of everyone else who clicked on this wont read passed this paragraph.
So I've been seeing this girl for just about the 2 month mark now and I like her, it's been cool just having a "friend" out of the whole thing ya know? I actually like going grocery shopping and stupid crap like that with her. I'm attracted to her and I could see myself with her for a long time......but, I'm not seeing her enough. She has 2 kids. I was ok with that. I'm pretty understanding, I wouldn't ever fault her for me not getting attention because she has kids, I know they'll always come 1st but lately it's been kind of ridiculous. When I 1st met her I worked around that. Meaning I shifted band practice to a different day (my guitairst, who is my friend and band mate of almost 11 yrs now and a husband and father of 1 wasn't that happy)...I moved gym times around etc etc. Ok I thought this is what's supposed to happen, I have to adjust to having a new person in my life and rearrange for that. So lately I've slowly been reincorporating some important things back into my life that were put on hold, namely longer gym time and more music/band things. With that I had to see her less. I would text her, "what's your schedule like this weekend?" on a Thursday, and she would get me back "Won't know till tomorrow". Ok...I don't raise my voice or anything but I had to tell her I can't keep putting everything I do on a last minute call because I never know when I'm going to see you. At 1st she got really defensive and told me that I was just as much to blame as she was.....which is untrue. By the 2nd week I hung out with her I had asked her to hang out with my after work, even if it meant going for a walk around one of our complexes or just hanging out front of her house when the kids went to sleep. I invited her to my gym, to my house for dinner, etc etc.....all things that we could do to be together for just an hr or 2 to atleast see each other more than once a week. Finally she admitted to me that I was the 1st person she had seen on a regular basis since her divorce, that her ex gives her a hard time when he has to take the kids more, her parents watch them during the day twice a week already etc etc......I thanked her for communicating with me and told her I would be patient. This week I thought about it alot and I knew she had kids going into it, but I really am an attention whore and I told her that. I mean I just need more if you want me to be with you solely. On the other hand, when I think about moving on and leaving her alone.....I actually feel f'ing horrible about it. So to make things even deeper, like 4-5 months ago this girl joined my gym and was getting the tour while I was working out....I pretty much knocked over 5 senior citizens to introduce myself to her. I walked into a few walls after talking to her and that was that, hadn't seen her since. Out of nowhere I just got a FB message from her "Hey what time do you do your cardio, I'm looking for a partner".......so of course I'm talking to her on there, then text and now meeting her tomorrow. Being really unsure about this whole thing as I am, I actually walked on over to mom's and explained my situation. Like the old school Italian in the kitchen she made some food and told me "I don't know alot, but I know if you keep waiting for someone who doesn't have time for you, you'll end up alone." I told her about the kids and it's not easy for her, and my mom was understanding, but she also knew about alot of the things I did which I'm not mentioning here to get to see her and she brought that up..."If you could do all that to be with her, if she really really wanted to be with you, she'd find a way to get her children babysat and make an effort." I told her about the other girl and she basically told me you'd be nuts to not alteast hang out with her at the gym. Last part I promise... So early this Sun morning I picked my mother up to get some materials at Home Depot for work she's getting done. After that I ran next door to Target...where I bumped into the girl from the gym......with my mom. To save me from typing anymore or you reading anymore, unless I'm an idiot this girl was way excited to see me and ended up talking to us for 15 min in Target! It ended with "See ya tomorrow!" A kiss on the cheek and then later a text. Again in the car my mom told me "You would be a fool to not hang out with that girl." I just got off the phone with the one I've been seeing and again, she didn't talk to her ex nor has she gotten a baby sitter. She told me she misses me but still did nothing... If you were me, what would you do? I'm excited about the gym chick wanting to work out and maybe "hang out" but I still feel horrible about the distance between the original girl. I mean the 1st month was AWESOME....now there's this. So what do you do? P.S. The PitViper you know is officially a bitch. |
11-06-2011, 10:35 PM | #2 |
Broca Beach Realtor
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Broca Beach
Posts: 8,260
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Go for gym girl. Problem solved.
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"[Zarana] it's obvious by how many post[sic] you have... That you live a sheltered life...probably surrounded by your toys" |
11-06-2011, 10:46 PM | #3 |
Question Authority
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Maine
Posts: 12,980
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Listen to your Mother, young man!
Seriously, though - listen to your Mom. I think she's right. Go for the gym girl. That other woman doesn't have much free time to begin with, but if she REALLY wanted to - she could make some time for you. |
11-06-2011, 10:52 PM | #4 |
Hisstank.Com General
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Connecticut
Posts: 9,031
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As a single parent myself I give you this advice.
Run.
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Black Llama |
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11-06-2011, 11:00 PM | #5 |
I Brake For Asari!
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Thessia
Posts: 32,377
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You are asking a question to which you already know the answer.
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My BST List: http://www.hisstank.com/forum/g-i-jo...want-list.html My Feedback: http://www.hisstank.com/forum/buy-se...grenadier.html |
11-06-2011, 11:16 PM | #6 |
Banned
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: North Jersey
Posts: 10,454
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11-06-2011, 11:21 PM | #7 |
Registered Nurse Emperor
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Washington State
Posts: 5,507
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Because you're a decent human being.
You thought that something might come of this, but it seems like she doesn't want to give back an equal amount. Life's too short to stay with someone who doesn't treat you how you wanna be treated. Give the gym girl a shot... she probably won't fault you for wanting to spend more time in the gym
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11-06-2011, 11:23 PM | #8 |
Banned
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Boston, MA
Posts: 19,093
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YOU WERE RIGHT!
Ahahahaha!!!!!! |
11-06-2011, 11:25 PM | #9 |
Scarred Cobra Officer
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 4,612
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It's not like you agreed to be mutually exclusive. Try out gym girl.
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11-06-2011, 11:25 PM | #10 |
Banned
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Boston, MA
Posts: 19,093
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Screw her and go with the gym chick
You don't need the extra baggage what with ROC 2 coming u and all |
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