[edgecrusher]

Video has pretty good choices and he's right about 1991 marking the end of Hasbro's real love for the line.

[momaw nadon]

For my list, going to stay within '82 thru '85, as we all know there are too many that would make this list after then and the list is too short with a limit of 10. Also going to try and overlook the realism factor and lean more into playable/fun for grading on my list. Funny to think about as most of vehicles are hard for me to overlook, and this is coming from a Star Wars guy too. This list is in no particular order.

FLAK - Not totally bad and not really a vehicle ether, but is listed as one, so is included. Really needed a trailer or something to tow this thing around. Plus the fact that escapes me is where would you get ammunition once deployed? Some might point out well it's a laser, but in the sculpt there are rounds under the barrel, three of them. With that you only have 3 shots, 5 max is a stretch then it becomes a bullet sponge. Hasbro did much better later on in the line than this one.

SHARC - This one had potential, but fell very short of any that was there. This one was very hard for me to overlook even as a kid, as that any jet hitting the water at the speed it would have to be traveling at to fly with it's very small wings and fat body would become a very cool explosion to see. Even if you think about it in a high diver way of thinking. There is just too much mass and too much speed. Plus no controls for flight, or even underwater other than the left and right. That aside, I would not like to be the Joe strapped to the underside during it all. If they would have kept is just a sub, would have been cooler, but then you have the cockpit. No other figure ever worked in it other than Deep Six, then the cartoon added to the kick below the belt with showing that it should have had 2 seats. Hasbro what happened? Did the Pentagon pull the Joe's budge?

Slugger - Now this one wasn't crap, but just thinking about Thunder trying to reload this thing was. The shells would have been massive for one guy as it wasn't big enough to carry a crew or any type of load assist equipment. Then thinking about the gun firing would blow this little artillery piece away even with the spade. Too much for me to overlook. Would have been better with a little realism to the design.

Silver Mirage - Now I really liked this one, but the thing was just too fragile. Even more so than the RAM and couldn't be fixed like the RAM. The one I had would continue to break as the glue would not work with the plastic used. One reason this one makes the list.

Cobra Flight Pod - Same as the Silver Mirage, as just to fragile. I don't think I was able to ever keep it together during play. Looked good when was sitting, just don't touch it.

I think I'm going to call my list done. As there were some good vehicles after '85, but many more were not. Think the HAVOC got enough beating anyway. Though Hasbro seemed to drop the ball on many of the vehicles after '85. One comes to mind as some pointed out, the Mamba. It had some cool makings for something great, but the rocket pod/manned missiles were a fail. Should have made it more like the Russian Hind. Giving it some area to hold troops with the size of it. Though that is my opinion, as many might disagree.

momaw nadon

[Tim 121RVC]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Salvo01

COBRA IMP: every time they launched a missile they had to replace the driver.

I believe there´s enough space for the driver to sit inside instead of standing, so he could take cover. Check out these pics, it's designed as a seat IMO (blueprints also speak of a "seating area"):

[Yeet]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Digital Ghost

I’m just going to assume that the people with the Pogo on their lists are thinking this is supposed to be the top 10 most awesome.

The POGO and its Star brigade repaint are the top 2 greatest Cobra vehicles of all time, with the Buzz Boar at number 3. The Buzz Boar was so great, that one ended up in Wakanda and killed Proxima Midnight

[Owner of a Lonely B.A.T.]

Good topic.

There's a lot of aspects to consider on this...reality, functionality etc.

But I'm just gonna go with 10 vehicles I didn't like for various reasons.

In no order...

- The mini packs
I'm sorry but on an overall basis these just were weird. From the under sized tank car, to rocket sled, to the radar station, to the battle axe while all of these might have been an inexpensive add on to a figure they all just were odd for me. The only exceptable and barely is the gyro coptor and frankly the Annihilator helipack is way better.

-Cobra Jet Pack
Ok first off its ugly as hell. Bulky. Oversized, and the CLAW just overall is more iconic...granted I don't doubt the Jet Pack is PROBABLY faster holds more fuel etc...but its just so un-needed compared to the CLAW.

-FANG III
Ok the original is pretty simple but a cool piece. And while the II is a little bulky its an fun acceptable successor. But the III...man that is just terrible on all aspects...even worse that they repainted it a FEW times.

-Sky Sweeper / Hydra Jet
For a jet thats based on the stealth bomber low profile design its a pretty damn big profile. And I have no use for its drone pod thing. It looks even worse in red and blue and then there is the sonic attack feature...ugh.

-Silver Mirage
I gotta admit, I understand that its supposed to be a faster version compared to the RAM, but why take a faster bike and add the albatross of a sidecar?

-Battle Blitz
Its a one man...seemingly heavily armored (except in the drivers area) one man scooter? I mean it doesn't even have weapons?

-Cycle Armor
What a hunk of crap.

-Attack Cruiser
HAHAHAHAHA
This thing is so stupid its epic in how bad it is.

-Strike HISS
Hey kids...were you a little disappoint with the HISS II? Wait...we're gonna kill your hopes with this over thought out tubby bitch of a tank. Its snake themed tank that looks like a baby piggy cosplaying a snake.

-The PIT
Holy hell this thing just gives me a damn headache thinking about how awful this is. Its a boat right? No? Its a Tank? Well I'm still sticking with the idea that its something that floats...like a turd.

-Weapons Transport
Hey kids you need something to tow around one bomb?

-LCV Recon Sled
Its a...
Well its more like...
But it has these smaller wheels...
And you lay down on it...
HAWK HOW THE HELL DO YOU WORK THIS THING?

-Costal Defender
Ok wait right there Cobra forces, I just need to open this flap, and 2 more...the I can flip this crate part over and set up my radar dish and in like 10 minutes or so I'll be ready to fire two rockets at you.

-Ghost Hawk II
This has the dubious honor of being the first and ONLY G.I. Joe item so bad...I returned it. Between the 5POA Duke, and the over missiled wings and just the worst vehicle ever, for me at least.



Honorable mention

ALL OF BATTLE FORCE 2000 sorta

I actually don't mind MOST of Battle Force 2000 as vehicles as single vehicles. Sure the Dominator, Eliminator, Marauder, Sky Sweeper, Vector Jet, and Vindicator are all a little out there but their supposed to be cutting edge new tech and frankly a lot of Joe isn't super realistic so I can live with it.

The Pulverizer is just awful. Its that raising cannon pop extension tube that kills it.

But for as much as I can tolerate the BF2K the Future Fortress bit is just awful. It looks less like a fortress and more like the main vehicles fell apart and they made a makeshift shanty town in a desperate attempt to not die because the government gave them bum vehicles that fell apart on the first mission. Its like the Little Rascals garbage picked the parts and made them a last effort before they die stand.

BATTLE FORCE 2000 COMBINE TO FOR SHANTY TOWN!!!!

[Sentinel Red]

Kinda want to drag the OP outside and scream at them for several hours for the audacity of putting the gorgeous X-19 in their list, good grief.

It's funny, the more the line tried to come up with more off the wall stuff, the more it turned me off. I have great fondness for most of the OG '82-86 stuff then have utter contempt for most things after *except* the Phantom X-19, I still think it's one of the best things they've ever made to this day. The Mamba and Ice Wolf are the only other things post '86 I like. Everything else can get in the bin.

[Eight]

Since this got bumped, can anyone explain why the Cobra Battle Barge isn't listed here!?

Nevermind a top 10, you only need one pick... and it's the "barge".

It's not a barge; it'd be useless in battle; and I'm pretty certain it's just a left-over mould from something else that Hasbro decided to stick in a box. Someone obviously noticed it floats, and so it became a barge.

I hate this thing so much.

[Cobra Agent 66]

I honestly couldn't say. I kind of stopped following the vehicles after about 1986, but there were a few here and there I liked. When I go to Yojoe and look around the later years, there are still a few I don't remember at all. I just collected a few figures at that point.

[Owner of a Lonely B.A.T.]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Eight

Since this got bumped, can anyone explain why the Cobra Battle Barge isn't listed here!?

Nevermind a top 10, you only need one pick... and it's the "barge".

It's not a barge; it'd be useless in battle; and I'm pretty certain it's just a left-over mould from something else that Hasbro decided to stick in a box. Someone obviously noticed it floats, and so it became a barge.

I hate this thing so much.

Ahhh the Battle Barge.

Its like Cobra said, "Hey the fishing around Cobra Island is great. How can we get the Commander to surround the Island with fishing platforms?"

*SNAP*

"I've got it...add three guns and a radar dish and call it a Battle Barge!"

[Yeet]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Owner of a Lonely B.A.T.

Ahhh the Battle Barge.

Its like Cobra said, "Hey the fishing around Cobra Island is great. How can we get the Commander to surround the Island with fishing platforms?"

*SNAP*

"I've got it...add three guns and a radar dish and call it a Battle Barge!"

It’s actually genius. The radar locate the fish and the guns harvest them!