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07-28-2021, 07:06 AM | #201 |
Iron Grenadier
Join Date: Jun 2020
Location: Midwest
Posts: 845
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07-28-2021, 08:53 AM | #202 |
Crimson Guard
Join Date: May 2015
Location: CT
Posts: 2,052
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So it sounds like the movie is a dud?
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07-28-2021, 05:30 PM | #203 |
Cobra Viper
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: San Diego
Posts: 155
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I don't know that I'd go that far. If it were titled "fill-in-the-blank-action-movie" I think it would be fine. Not great, but certainly not a dud. When you label it GI Joe, I think the Joe fans put a lot of expectations on the movie. For me, it didn't, or just barely met those expectations.
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07-28-2021, 08:56 PM | #204 |
Crimson Guard
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 1,853
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The Snake-Eyes movie isn't just a bad GI Joe movie. It's just a terrible movie period. There's almost nothing good about it. It's a patchwork assembly of scenes and motivations. It's completely lacking personality, depth, or joy. Much like its main character.
Making your hero actually the villain in his own origin story could potentially be interesting, but it requires deft craftmanship to do it. This film can't pull it off. You better make the main character likeable or at least interesting. Snake-Eyes is not a hero. Any integrity the character exhibits is actually a lie to meet his own selfish interests. It was at the moment SE is about to slit the throat of a defenseless man that I had to wonder, "Who is this movie for? Aren't kids supposed to want to buy toys after seeing this?" At the heart of any Snake-Eyes story will likely be his relationship with Storm Shadow. Their relationship here only seems to take place over a few days. And it's based on SE lying to SS and causing his downfall. Again, the hero is the problem. The source of SS's character crash is his apparent pride, yet he never really seems that prideful. He doesn't like to listen to his security chief, although it's never clear why. Does he not like outsiders? He just brought one into the clan. And one of the clan's Masters clearly had origins outside of the family. While this film could have spent more time developing the new friendship between SE and SS, it gives new character Akiko seemingly more interactions with SE than SS gets. Akiko isn't a bad character, but it would have been wiser to develop the SE/SS relationship more instead. The villain Kenta is generic and not particularly memorable. His quest to steal a magic crystal is so laughably silly, it should seem right at home in a GI Joe movie. A GI Joe movie which is trying to have fun, that is. This film is joyless, though. Kenta and SS had a difference of opinion regarding the Arishikage clan, but it doesn't really seem like that difference is spelled out. Kenta seems greedy and involved in bad things. Is SS driven to perform good deeds? SS wants to bring in outsiders to the clan, so he doesn't seem like a traditionalist. So what exactly was their conflict based on again? Kenta was a member of the Arishikage, but he doesn’t tell his undercover agent, Snake-Eyes, how to pass the three tests to join the clan and gain their trust. Seems like that would have been some valuable intel to pass on your inside man. Speaking of the tests, there are giant pythons in this movie. And they're not owned by Cobra. They're owned by the good guy ninjas. Honestly, I almost walked out of the theater when the snakes showed up. The Arishikage. The old good ninja cliché. Nothing like good guy assassins. Good guy assassins with pure hearts. This seems like a concept which needs some attention to work in the modern storytelling landscape. Batman Begins did some of this legwork with its League of Assassins, who were essentially ninja trying to steer the world in the "right direction." The test to join the secret Arishikage ninja clan? You just have to be humbly kind and not have anger in your heart. And BOOM, you're an Arishikage. Super easy. Don't worry about training. You'll get to that later. Or maybe you won't. Oh by the way, don't worry about being able to detect infiltrators. We rely on laser fences and not finely tuned instincts and awareness. And whatever you do, don't look in the shed we have up the hill. Nothing important is up there. Only 5 people know what's in there. Except when the alarm goes off and everyone runs up there to check on it. Shhh. You weren't supposed to know about our magic rock. Did we tell you about the magic rock? Hold on, you're in for a doozy. We're to guard it but never use it. Why don't we just destroy it? Hmmm. Good question. We'll just keep it in this shed, for now. GI Joe and Cobra and the Dump of Exposition. Remember how the story was creeping along, and suddenly you got hit in the face with exposition about Cobra and GI Joe and everything else non-ninja during your ninja story? Yeah. Now we all know what whiplash feels like. I wish I could like Scarlett. She seems angry. Probably cause she's hungry. Her cheeks and whatever pride the actress has are being sucked into a black hole. She's not even a character. She just rattles off exposition and platitudes. She could have been interesting, though. Get rid of Akiko (who actually was admirably portrayed). Make Scarlett a "consultant" who is temporarily staying at the temple. Have her questioning Snake-Eyes and his loyalty. You get a chance to develop another Joe and build the Snake-Eyes/Scarlett relationship. Or don't. Just have Scarlett gruffly chew out lines which are too difficult to swallow. Baroness doesn't really seem all that threatening, and Cobra doesn't seem so secret. The Baroness role, like all vixens, leads itself to some scenery chewing and vamping. But every femme needs her fatale. She's just vamping. She threatens but seems all talk. The actress could be capable but she's not reined in. And apparently can't see betrayal coming (look an accidental theme running through the film!). Cobra is such a secret organization, it leaves its logo on shipping crates for the weapons it deals. Cobra flashing its logo is part of the silly charm to the brand though. However shouldn't it be a MARS Industries logo? The action was just generic. Snake-Eye's pit fight scene had some style to it, it was also on the edge of nauseating to watch. All the other fight scenes seem to be, "Hey! We're outnumbered." The fights weren't particularly clever or memorable. For an action movie, this seems like sacrilege. One of the heroes must have been a Looney Tunes fan growing up, because they use some Wile E Coyote tactics to defeat the bad guy. At least Scarlett got to shoot her stealthy crossbow, after landing noisily via helicopter. She quickly realizes how silly it is and at least upgrades to something more practical. Overall, this is a laughably terrible movie. It does nothing to help the brand, but instead just justifies the public's easy dismissal of it. The idea to launch a reboot of a franchise about a team of military experts who battle an evil organization bent on world domination with a film about an unlikable main character and a magic crystal is a bold one. It's also woefully misguided. But much like how GI Joe membership is grandfathered in, GI Joe films will certainly continue to be released but no interest or credit will be earned. Because if you weren't a Joe fan (or member) before, you're certainly not going to be after this movie. |
07-28-2021, 09:16 PM | #205 |
Cobra Viper
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: CA
Posts: 414
|
Quote:
The Snake-Eyes movie isn't just a bad GI Joe movie. It's just a terrible movie period. There's almost nothing good about it. It's a patchwork assembly of scenes and motivations. It's completely lacking personality, depth, or joy. Much like its main character.
Making your hero actually the villain in his own origin story could potentially be interesting, but it requires deft craftmanship to do it. This film can't pull it off. You better make the main character likeable or at least interesting. Snake-Eyes is not a hero. Any integrity the character exhibits is actually a lie to meet his own selfish interests. It was at the moment SE is about to slit the throat of a defenseless man that I had to wonder, "Who is this movie for? Aren't kids supposed to want to buy toys after seeing this?" At the heart of any Snake-Eyes story will likely be his relationship with Storm Shadow. Their relationship here only seems to take place over a few days. And it's based on SE lying to SS and causing his downfall. Again, the hero is the problem. The source of SS's character crash is his apparent pride, yet he never really seems that prideful. He doesn't like to listen to his security chief, although it's never clear why. Does he not like outsiders? He just brought one into the clan. And one of the clan's Masters clearly had origins outside of the family. While this film could have spent more time developing the new friendship between SE and SS, it gives new character Akiko seemingly more interactions with SE than SS gets. Akiko isn't a bad character, but it would have been wiser to develop the SE/SS relationship more instead. The villain Kenta is generic and not particularly memorable. His quest to steal a magic crystal is so laughably silly, it should seem right at home in a GI Joe movie. A GI Joe movie which is trying to have fun, that is. This film is joyless, though. Kenta and SS had a difference of opinion regarding the Arishikage clan, but it doesn't really seem like that difference is spelled out. Kenta seems greedy and involved in bad things. Is SS driven to perform good deeds? SS wants to bring in outsiders to the clan, so he doesn't seem like a traditionalist. So what exactly was their conflict based on again? Kenta was a member of the Arishikage, but he doesn’t tell his undercover agent, Snake-Eyes, how to pass the three tests to join the clan and gain their trust. Seems like that would have been some valuable intel to pass on your inside man. Speaking of the tests, there are giant pythons in this movie. And they're not owned by Cobra. They're owned by the good guy ninjas. Honestly, I almost walked out of the theater when the snakes showed up. The Arishikage. The old good ninja cliché. Nothing like good guy assassins. Good guy assassins with pure hearts. This seems like a concept which needs some attention to work in the modern storytelling landscape. Batman Begins did some of this legwork with its League of Assassins, who were essentially ninja trying to steer the world in the "right direction." The test to join the secret Arishikage ninja clan? You just have to be humbly kind and not have anger in your heart. And BOOM, you're an Arishikage. Super easy. Don't worry about training. You'll get to that later. Or maybe you won't. Oh by the way, don't worry about being able to detect infiltrators. We rely on laser fences and not finely tuned instincts and awareness. And whatever you do, don't look in the shed we have up the hill. Nothing important is up there. Only 5 people know what's in there. Except when the alarm goes off and everyone runs up there to check on it. Shhh. You weren't supposed to know about our magic rock. Did we tell you about the magic rock? Hold on, you're in for a doozy. We're to guard it but never use it. Why don't we just destroy it? Hmmm. Good question. We'll just keep it in this shed, for now. GI Joe and Cobra and the Dump of Exposition. Remember how the story was creeping along, and suddenly you got hit in the face with exposition about Cobra and GI Joe and everything else non-ninja during your ninja story? Yeah. Now we all know what whiplash feels like. I wish I could like Scarlett. She seems angry. Probably cause she's hungry. Her cheeks and whatever pride the actress has are being sucked into a black hole. She's not even a character. She just rattles off exposition and platitudes. She could have been interesting, though. Get rid of Akiko (who actually was admirably portrayed). Make Scarlett a "consultant" who is temporarily staying at the temple. Have her questioning Snake-Eyes and his loyalty. You get a chance to develop another Joe and build the Snake-Eyes/Scarlett relationship. Or don't. Just have Scarlett gruffly chew out lines which are too difficult to swallow. Baroness doesn't really seem all that threatening, and Cobra doesn't seem so secret. The Baroness role, like all vixens, leads itself to some scenery chewing and vamping. But every femme needs her fatale. She's just vamping. She threatens but seems all talk. The actress could be capable but she's not reined in. And apparently can't see betrayal coming (look an accidental theme running through the film!). Cobra is such a secret organization, it leaves its logo on shipping crates for the weapons it deals. Cobra flashing its logo is part of the silly charm to the brand though. However shouldn't it be a MARS Industries logo? The action was just generic. Snake-Eye's pit fight scene had some style to it, it was also on the edge of nauseating to watch. All the other fight scenes seem to be, "Hey! We're outnumbered." The fights weren't particularly clever or memorable. For an action movie, this seems like sacrilege. One of the heroes must have been a Looney Tunes fan growing up, because they use some Wile E Coyote tactics to defeat the bad guy. At least Scarlett got to shoot her stealthy crossbow, after landing noisily via helicopter. She quickly realizes how silly it is and at least upgrades to something more practical. Overall, this is a laughably terrible movie. It does nothing to help the brand, but instead just justifies the public's easy dismissal of it. The idea to launch a reboot of a franchise about a team of military experts who battle an evil organization bent on world domination with a film about an unlikable main character and a magic crystal is a bold one. It's also woefully misguided. But much like how GI Joe membership is grandfathered in, GI Joe films will certainly continue to be released but no interest or credit will be earned. Because if you weren't a Joe fan (or member) before, you're certainly not going to be after this movie. |
07-28-2021, 09:17 PM | #206 |
Hisstank.Com General
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Brooklyn NY!
Posts: 5,239
|
The box office totals agree.
I had no interest in this but was considering maybe catching it on cable. Now I don’t think I’d waste the time. I appreciate all the input from the thread. It validates my initial impression of the film.
__________________
Visit my vintage Joe restoration page! https://www.flickr.com/photos/131988164@N07/albums Cross Country's super smooth feedback thread. http://www.hisstank.com/forum/buy-se...ml#post4456308 Currently available Hasbro items. PM me for your prices (DO NOT be discouraged by the listing prices) https://www.ebay.com/sch/i.html?_dkr...nirtoys&_oac=1 |
07-29-2021, 09:49 AM | #207 |
Iron Grenadier
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 895
|
Quote:
The Snake-Eyes movie isn't just a bad GI Joe movie. It's just a terrible movie period. There's almost nothing good about it. It's a patchwork assembly of scenes and motivations. It's completely lacking personality, depth, or joy. Much like its main character.
Making your hero actually the villain in his own origin story could potentially be interesting, but it requires deft craftmanship to do it. This film can't pull it off. You better make the main character likeable or at least interesting. Snake-Eyes is not a hero. Any integrity the character exhibits is actually a lie to meet his own selfish interests. It was at the moment SE is about to slit the throat of a defenseless man that I had to wonder, "Who is this movie for? Aren't kids supposed to want to buy toys after seeing this?" At the heart of any Snake-Eyes story will likely be his relationship with Storm Shadow. Their relationship here only seems to take place over a few days. And it's based on SE lying to SS and causing his downfall. Again, the hero is the problem. The source of SS's character crash is his apparent pride, yet he never really seems that prideful. He doesn't like to listen to his security chief, although it's never clear why. Does he not like outsiders? He just brought one into the clan. And one of the clan's Masters clearly had origins outside of the family. While this film could have spent more time developing the new friendship between SE and SS, it gives new character Akiko seemingly more interactions with SE than SS gets. Akiko isn't a bad character, but it would have been wiser to develop the SE/SS relationship more instead. The villain Kenta is generic and not particularly memorable. His quest to steal a magic crystal is so laughably silly, it should seem right at home in a GI Joe movie. A GI Joe movie which is trying to have fun, that is. This film is joyless, though. Kenta and SS had a difference of opinion regarding the Arishikage clan, but it doesn't really seem like that difference is spelled out. Kenta seems greedy and involved in bad things. Is SS driven to perform good deeds? SS wants to bring in outsiders to the clan, so he doesn't seem like a traditionalist. So what exactly was their conflict based on again? Kenta was a member of the Arishikage, but he doesn’t tell his undercover agent, Snake-Eyes, how to pass the three tests to join the clan and gain their trust. Seems like that would have been some valuable intel to pass on your inside man. Speaking of the tests, there are giant pythons in this movie. And they're not owned by Cobra. They're owned by the good guy ninjas. Honestly, I almost walked out of the theater when the snakes showed up. The Arishikage. The old good ninja cliché. Nothing like good guy assassins. Good guy assassins with pure hearts. This seems like a concept which needs some attention to work in the modern storytelling landscape. Batman Begins did some of this legwork with its League of Assassins, who were essentially ninja trying to steer the world in the "right direction." The test to join the secret Arishikage ninja clan? You just have to be humbly kind and not have anger in your heart. And BOOM, you're an Arishikage. Super easy. Don't worry about training. You'll get to that later. Or maybe you won't. Oh by the way, don't worry about being able to detect infiltrators. We rely on laser fences and not finely tuned instincts and awareness. And whatever you do, don't look in the shed we have up the hill. Nothing important is up there. Only 5 people know what's in there. Except when the alarm goes off and everyone runs up there to check on it. Shhh. You weren't supposed to know about our magic rock. Did we tell you about the magic rock? Hold on, you're in for a doozy. We're to guard it but never use it. Why don't we just destroy it? Hmmm. Good question. We'll just keep it in this shed, for now. GI Joe and Cobra and the Dump of Exposition. Remember how the story was creeping along, and suddenly you got hit in the face with exposition about Cobra and GI Joe and everything else non-ninja during your ninja story? Yeah. Now we all know what whiplash feels like. I wish I could like Scarlett. She seems angry. Probably cause she's hungry. Her cheeks and whatever pride the actress has are being sucked into a black hole. She's not even a character. She just rattles off exposition and platitudes. She could have been interesting, though. Get rid of Akiko (who actually was admirably portrayed). Make Scarlett a "consultant" who is temporarily staying at the temple. Have her questioning Snake-Eyes and his loyalty. You get a chance to develop another Joe and build the Snake-Eyes/Scarlett relationship. Or don't. Just have Scarlett gruffly chew out lines which are too difficult to swallow. Baroness doesn't really seem all that threatening, and Cobra doesn't seem so secret. The Baroness role, like all vixens, leads itself to some scenery chewing and vamping. But every femme needs her fatale. She's just vamping. She threatens but seems all talk. The actress could be capable but she's not reined in. And apparently can't see betrayal coming (look an accidental theme running through the film!). Cobra is such a secret organization, it leaves its logo on shipping crates for the weapons it deals. Cobra flashing its logo is part of the silly charm to the brand though. However shouldn't it be a MARS Industries logo? The action was just generic. Snake-Eye's pit fight scene had some style to it, it was also on the edge of nauseating to watch. All the other fight scenes seem to be, "Hey! We're outnumbered." The fights weren't particularly clever or memorable. For an action movie, this seems like sacrilege. One of the heroes must have been a Looney Tunes fan growing up, because they use some Wile E Coyote tactics to defeat the bad guy. At least Scarlett got to shoot her stealthy crossbow, after landing noisily via helicopter. She quickly realizes how silly it is and at least upgrades to something more practical. Overall, this is a laughably terrible movie. It does nothing to help the brand, but instead just justifies the public's easy dismissal of it. The idea to launch a reboot of a franchise about a team of military experts who battle an evil organization bent on world domination with a film about an unlikable main character and a magic crystal is a bold one. It's also woefully misguided. But much like how GI Joe membership is grandfathered in, GI Joe films will certainly continue to be released but no interest or credit will be earned. Because if you weren't a Joe fan (or member) before, you're certainly not going to be after this movie. |
07-29-2021, 10:28 AM | #208 |
Psych-Out's Intern
Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: Clifton, TX
Posts: 205
|
Okay, I've seen the movie. Here's my take.
Let me preface my statements. I am a old Joe fan from the 80s and I bristle at the younger folks in here calling out people like me as being only interested in two-hour toy commercials from 1986. I don't mind retconning if it's done well, especially if the original story isn't particularly well-written either. And that's my first point of argument against those who think the writing of this movie was bland and flavorless. Did anyone remember reading the original Marvel run written by Larry Hama and think, "Well, this is weird.."? It wasn't like the comics were written by Solzhenistsyn. They were COMIC BOOKS. Then entire movie was ninjatastic, and in some ways reminded me of those 80-90s martials arts action schlock films like "American Ninja" with Michael Dudikoff or literally every last thing featuring the talents of Jean-Claude Van Damme. Was the dialogue canned and uninteresting? Absolutely. Is this the only movie to commit this sin? Not even kinda. About the only time I thought the movie went into the deep end of the pool and started flailing wildly for help was when they recast the basilisk from that Harry Potter movie. Giant snakes? Really? I expected some mysticism in a movie about ninjas, but that was pretty bizarre. It was also no more bizarre than anything Hama wrote. I took a group of teenagers in my church youth group to see it last night. Wanna know what their impression was? They loved it. To a person. Not one of them said it sucked. Because the movie wasn't aimed at me, it was aimed squarely at them. The original Snake-Eyes origin story was of a Vietnam veteran whose family was killed while he was deployed and his subsequent search for a home, ending with his time in the service. Oh, and he was trained by an ancient ninja clan somewhere along the way. That story would never have resonated today. Could they have used the wars in the Middle East to bring that same story forward to today? Sure. Japan did assist some of the rebuilding efforts in Afghanistan and has a permanent base in Djibouti to help with anti-piracy operations off the eastern coast of Africa. Could Tommy have been a soldier stationed there, rescued by one of his American allies? Sure thing! And it would have been a great story, too. But, that's a story for us. It's not a story for the kids in those theatre seats with me. After 20 years of warfare (think about it, every one of those kids with me at that movie last night were born in a time of war and have never known anything else), the American public is tired of war stories. We're GI Joe fans, we LIVE for war stories. We're unusual. And we weren't the intended audience. We are the outliers on the bell curve. I found the movie to be lighthearted, typical summer action fare and I cannot stress the word 'typical' enough. It was a generic action movie, as so many have observed. You could literally have dropped just about any action toy or video game property into the title and you would not have had to change much. I thought GI Joe deserved much better, but the fourteen kids with me last night thought the movie was just fine as it was. More power to them. |
07-29-2021, 10:54 AM | #209 |
Iron Grenadier
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 916
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07-29-2021, 06:48 PM | #210 |
The Man You Know & Love
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: In The Middle of a Late Night Crew Orgy
Posts: 28,211
|
So is this movie not making much money because alot of the older GI Joe fans are not supporting it?
Or is it not making much money because it's not appealing to the younger new audience it was hoping to reach? Oh wait...I'm sorry. It's Delta's fault. |
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