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This top 10 vintage joe list is beyond atrocious

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Old 01-27-2021, 04:05 PM   #21
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Snake Eyes V1.5, Cobra Commander V1.5, Cobra Trooper V1.5, Cobra Officer V1.5, Snow Job, Torpedo, Storm Shadow, Firefly, Blowtorch, Eels tied with Snow Serpent. Those would be my top 10, from childhood, in no particular order. Looking at my list, it seems kinda odd now LOL.
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Old 01-28-2021, 03:27 AM   #22
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We are about to change all that my friend
Yeah, I saw you mention her being "next up on the docket" (in your thread). You have your work cut out for you, though. There's little positive inspiration to be drawn from that original figure, imo.

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It is indeed a travesty, but it's no surprise. She's always a early waver as the absolute, undisputed premier female Joe character. Early wavers, as we know, are almost always "not quite there" in terms of quality, look, etc. All part of the development process. Why she hasn't gotten better redo's later in lines, not quite sure. Hopefully Classified rectifies that some point soon.
I hope so, too. However, they aren't exactly off to a very promising start. Speaking of disrespecting women, does it bother anyone else that neither Lady Jaye nor Scarlett ever appeared on any vintage vehicle's box art? I get G.I.Joe was primarily seen as a "boys line", but if you're going to bother to produce the figures, you could at least make some effort to promote them.

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As far as Ninja Force Scarlett, obviously the articulation reduction from the action feature totally sucks, but I feel like her headsculpt easily withstands comparison to the first version of Scarlett, Cover Girl, either Zarana, and Lady Jaye, none of whom set very high bars in my opinion —— as characters, yes, but as headsculpts, no. I’d call Baroness easily the best 82-94 ladies headsculpt, but imo women’s headsculpts generally was just an area Hasbro struggled in, when they made them at all. In any case, it was really nice to get a Scarlett in the 90s...
It's not just the limited articulation, though. Those colours are a total eyesore. Plus, not trying to shame her or anything, but dat body doe. And 1984 Baroness gives me the creeps, especially in light of the disturbing developments regarding Michael Jackson's personal life.

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And the problem with Night Force was that half of them didn't require any improvement, and the other half weren't worth the effort.
Yeah, while the Night Force colour scheme was cool, were any of the figures really enhanced all that much? Maybe Lightfoot, I suppose. Sneak Peek and Psyche-Out don't count (those sculpts were beyond redemption). Plus the new paint job pretty much ruined Tunnel Rat. And Night Force Charbroil looks like he's on the wrong team.
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Old 01-28-2021, 04:22 AM   #23
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It's not just the limited articulation, though. Those colours are a total eyesore. Plus, not trying to shame her or anything, but dat body doe. And 1984 Baroness gives me the creeps, especially in light of the disturbing developments regarding Michael Jackson's personal life.
I mean, it was the time when all of Ninja Force had those blocky T-crotches and half of Star Brigade had those giant limited articulation suits. It’s kinda like the way half of the OG 13 have the same face, just part of the landscape of that era. In the early 90s, getting a Scarlett was huge, and to repeat, her headsculpt was really solid.

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Yeah, while the Night Force colour scheme was cool, were any of the figures really enhanced all that much? Maybe Lightfoot, I suppose. Sneak Peek and Psyche-Out don't count (those sculpts were beyond redemption). Plus the new paint job pretty much ruined Tunnel Rat. And Night Force Charbroil looks like he's on the wrong team.
Charbroil always looked like he was on the wrong team, outside of his mug anyway...even before considering the Cobra on his helmet...
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Old 01-28-2021, 08:07 AM   #24
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I feel like her headsculpt easily withstands comparison to the first version of Scarlett, Cover Girl, either Zarana, and Lady Jaye, none of whom set very high bars in my opinion —— as characters, yes, but as headsculpts, no. I’d call Baroness easily the best 82-94 ladies headsculpt, and if you count them, imo Chun Li and Sonya Blade were up there too, but imo women’s headsculpts generally was just an area Hasbro struggled in, when they made them at all.
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In the early 90s, getting a Scarlett was huge, and to repeat, her headsculpt was really solid.
I hear you. I guess I'm just not seeing what's so bad about either Zarana* or Lady Jaye** head-wise (besides bearing no resemblance to the cartoon/comics). Nor what's so good about the Baroness or "Ninja Force" Scarlett. But yes, that era's female figure's faces must be graded on a sliding scale. Scarlett v1 is definitely dreadful, and Cover Girl only barely better (Jinx being obviously irrelevant).

Looking over the women's headsculpts from other lines (in that same time period), the better ones are generally of a far larger scale (and several of those are still less than stellar). In the under 5" category, MASK's (well, VENOM's) Vanessa Warfield looks pretty nice, if slightly soft/simplified. However, take Anne Lewis from Kenner's "RoboCop & The Ultra Police", for example. You could basically swap her head onto a figure of Sam from "Lord of the Rings", and likely not even notice.

* Even the original one with the melon head.

** Kinda like Joan Cusack, actually.
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Old 01-28-2021, 08:46 AM   #25
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The list did its job fine - it has a solid 5 or 6 fair contenders plus a few unlikely curveball suggestions to outrage gatekeepimg morons who care way too much about this sort of thing, thus ensuring yet more clicks to share in the ‘outrage’.
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Old 01-28-2021, 08:45 PM   #26
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its an ok list. The only one I wouldn't put anywhere near the top 10 personally is Baroness (Fugly, boring figure).

Viper and Doc aren't in my top 10 either, just too bland.. but I love both of those figures. In general, the super early figures aren't as well-sculpted as later ones.

Can't argue with the rest, but I would have to find a way to get Snow Serpent, Eels, and Shockwave in the top 10

if the list were about favorite figures, it would be alot different.
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Old 01-28-2021, 09:07 PM   #27
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failure to include Hit&Run does not compute
What he said^^^^^^
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Old 01-29-2021, 03:24 AM   #28
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I hear you. I guess I'm just not seeing what's so bad about either Zarana* or Lady Jaye** head-wise (besides bearing no resemblance to the cartoon/comics). Nor what's so good about the Baroness or "Ninja Force" Scarlett. But yes, that era's female figure's faces must be graded on a sliding scale. Scarlett v1 is definitely dreadful, and Cover Girl only barely better (Jinx being obviously irrelevant).

Looking over the women's headsculpts from other lines (in that same time period), the better ones are generally of a far larger scale (and several of those are still less than stellar). In the under 5" category, MASK's (well, VENOM's) Vanessa Warfield looks pretty nice, if slightly soft/simplified. However, take Anne Lewis from Kenner's "RoboCop & The Ultra Police", for example. You could basically swap her head onto a figure of Sam from "Lord of the Rings", and likely not even notice.

* Even the original one with the melon head.

** Kinda like Joan Cusack, actually.
Yeah, as much as I’m a huge fan of 80s pop culture, that’s an area where things were not good : (
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Old 01-29-2021, 10:35 AM   #29
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Baroness is a case of a figure not really being great, but the card art and memory of her appearing as a figure was so awesome that you overlook it.
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Old 01-29-2021, 10:47 AM   #30
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One more quick thought on 80's era female action figures, and then I'll get back on topic ...

While she just misses the decade cutoff, I'd add that the '92 Lt Ripley (from Kenner's "Aliens") has an above average headsculpt. Plus, kinda sorta resembles Sigourney Weaver (if you squint really hard). Space Marine Vasquez, on the other hand, is basically just a "Karate Kid" with breasts sculpted on. Although, admittedly, the actual actress wasn't all that feminine either. Ironically enough, the best female face (on any 80s figure under 5") probably belongs to Wilykit. (Very loose definition of "action figure", though; she's more of a statue, really.)

Returning to the OP ... I wonder if drivers/pilots were intentionally excluded from the list? (Otherwise, a case could be made for Strato-Viper, W.O.R.M.S., Thrasher, etc.)
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