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12-20-2009, 11:22 PM | #1 |
Her Boy Toy
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Terrordrome
Posts: 2,202
|
1) I barely have a job--substitute teacher (work when there's work) and have no health/dental insurance.
2) I don't know how I'm going to pay for next month's rent (have been late for the past three months already) 3) I've been trying to get a teacher job (what I want more than anything and is what I do) for the past four months without any fortune or luck. 4) I am very depressed because I'm not teaching and feel worthless. 5) I don't have anyone to talk to other than my mother or father, but they are hard to talk to for various reasons. "Friends" just don't want to talk to me beyond a few minutes, nor do I want to be a burden or sound whiny/depressed. 6) No girl in my life, no verbal and emotional support system other than parents. 7) I had to sell my 25th Joes so that I could get my teeth scaled because I had developed spreading gingivitis. I long to have them back, but I can forget about it. 8) I haven't wanted to wake up each day for the past four months, except for two weeks when there was the possibility that I was going to get my old teaching job back. I am grateful that I have loving parents and that, for the most part, I am healthy. I am also very proud of the number of former students whom I have touched in various capacities and whom made this very clear upon my return as a mere substitute. But I'm in the situation I'm in, and it's the holidays, and the only thing that seems to make me remotely happy these days are MOTUC figures. I try to remember that tomorrow's a new day and you never know what it will bring and that I am a smart, good man. Then again, I'm afraid of tomorrow, realizing that it's another day requring money and will further contribute to my unhappiness. I repeatedly go back to #8. Sad. Pathetic. Weak. Unmanly. Stupid. Pussy. Call me what you will. |
12-20-2009, 11:24 PM | #2 |
#voteblackjack
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Northwood, NH
Posts: 35,747
|
Have you been to see a psychiritist? There are programs for those without health insurance.
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12-20-2009, 11:26 PM | #3 |
Her Boy Toy
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Terrordrome
Posts: 2,202
|
I left out crazy. Call me what you will.
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12-20-2009, 11:30 PM | #4 |
#voteblackjack
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Northwood, NH
Posts: 35,747
|
Not crazy. Seeing a doctor doesn't mean you're crazy.
I went to see one after my divorce becuase I was so depressed and out of sorts.
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12-20-2009, 11:40 PM | #5 |
Father of Four
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Virginia Beach, Virginia
Posts: 3,264
|
Dude - obviously I don't know you but I'm sorry to hear about these difficult times you're going through.
I've found when my happiness depends on my circumstance they just go up and down like rolling waves. Thats why I'm glad God is my life and I can put my hope in him - he never changes and so I have joy in spite of what may happen. Not trying to preach at you friend - just want you to know I'll be praying you get shown some mercy and hope this Christmas season. |
12-20-2009, 11:42 PM | #6 |
Red Two
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: 村八分
Posts: 1,025
|
Hey Rockin',
I feel for you. I've been there - down and out and life keeps kicking you in the teeth. But what helped me out was taking control. Your situation is not going to change all on it's own, you've got to do it yourself. I was also a substitute teacher (like you are now), but morning after morning of no calls (and no money!) I had to find something else. I ended up moving out of state for a job, away from my family and loved ones, and starting life over again. Now, it sounds like you are also going through some tough depression. Like Troynos said, seek help. Depression is a sickness, not a weakness. Seriously, don't wait on that. Talk to someone. And once you get back on your feet, things will start to fall into place. I wish you the best of luck. Hang in there, man. |
12-20-2009, 11:51 PM | #7 |
Her Boy Toy
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Terrordrome
Posts: 2,202
|
Quote:
Hey Rockin',
I feel for you. I've been there - down and out and life keeps kicking you in the teeth. But what helped me out was taking control. Your situation is not going to change all on it's own, you've got to do it yourself. I was also a substitute teacher (like you are now), but morning after morning of no calls (and no money!) I had to find something else. I ended up moving out of state for a job, away from my family and loved ones, and starting life over again. Now, it sounds like you are also going through some tough depression. Like Troynos said, seek help. Depression is a sickness, not a weakness. Seriously, don't wait on that. Talk to someone. And once you get back on your feet, things will start to fall into place. I wish you the best of luck. Hang in there, man. Thanks, anyway. You too, Dod Ear, as your words were very kind. |
12-20-2009, 11:56 PM | #8 |
#voteblackjack
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Northwood, NH
Posts: 35,747
|
I've been there myself. Lost my job. Went an entire month without pay of any kind from unemployment or new job.
There are churchs that give money to help with rent. Most towns even have rental assistance at the town halls. Yeah, it sucks to have to swallow the pride and accept help. But you do what you have to do to get back on solid footing and work your way up from there. Been there, it was rough, it sucked, but I did it and am in a better position then before.
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Join the New England G.I. Joe Collector's Group: Battleforce New England Join the March of Cobra. Read the epic adventure on Kindle Worlds and visit the page to learn more. https://www.facebook.com/marchofcobra/ |
12-20-2009, 11:58 PM | #9 |
CallMeChuckles
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Western Colorado
Posts: 3,688
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Things are tough all over.
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12-21-2009, 12:00 AM | #10 |
Banned
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: North Jersey
Posts: 10,454
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1st of all brother, you arent crazy and being in a tough situation doesnt make you a pussy.
I can tell you right now you arent alone. I started a business with a partner I trusted and it has been hell the whole way through, a few months ago I filed for unemployment and it sucks I agree. At my age having to come home to live with my mother felt like the most defeating thing in the entire world. Be thankfull you have a loving family that would take you in..just because you cant buy yourself things now, or buy gifts right now doesnt mean its going to be like this forever. We are in a recession..you arent being singled out, trust me I know 1st hand. What I do, is work part time when I can and as much as I hated the work I had to do, it enabled me to buy presents for people this year and keep gas in my Jeep. If you can do that fine, if not..dude no one is gonna come down on you, the people who matter most to you KNOW your situation. As far as women go...dont let that get to you now, when it happens, it happens..I'm sure the lack of funds is making your self esteem plummet but the current situation is NOT what makes you who you are..again..alot of people are going through this. I'm not saying dont look for chicks...but remember you are numero uno right now..lets get back on track put some cash in your pocket and "rebuild". Then worry about a girl...seriously, theres a ton of single women out there..no rush. If you do one thing...dont get lazy, dont lay in bed. No matter how meaningless and trivial these things seem which I'm about to say...do them. Do it for the structure. This may seem gay, but there was a time I was so anxiety ridden, so manic and borderline suicidal that these things helped me. 1. Exercise...if you set a time every day to do 10 push ups..make it your JOB to be doing those push ups at that time..wake up at a set time, go for a walk, do your push ups. Eat at a set time, exercise again etc...keep regimen, lack of structure and idle hands is no good. 2. Think of everything you want and tell yourself, make yourself believe you deserve it...when you see the things in your head that you want, start to change that thought to believing you already have it. Visualize yourself with a healthy bank account, a ton of Joes, a nice girl sitting across from you...and every single time reality kicks in and you get depressed..FIGHT BACK with the visualzation. 3. Visualize the things in your life that are making it rough...like visualize being broke as a mountain...behind that mountain is everything you want...tell that mountain to move or you will pound it into dust..think of yourself crumbling that mountain and all your fortunes flowing through to you where that giant asshole rock was. 4. Perception is reality...how you see it is how it is, if you think you arent worth it...then nothing good will come, if you see and think of yourself highly...then you are. Screw the situation....think of the good things you are....if it helps think of it like this...the situation youre in would break lesser men...youre still on your feet, that says something. 5. Dont give up man...Ive been in some dark DARK places and lost someone very close to me, that didnt have to happen. This is gonna pass...now that I've Dr. Phil'd the hell out of you I hope some of these things work...if they dont and you need an ear..hit me up. Yo Joe! Last edited by PitViper; 12-21-2009 at 12:05 AM.. |
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