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06-08-2009, 10:45 PM | #61 |
Crimson Guard
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Delaware
Posts: 2,426
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I was not a toy killer. I was a toy serial killer. Oh, I was always a pretty gentle kid when I played, and was awestruck by the aggressive clods who made toys fight by holding one in each hand and smacking them together.
A few years later though, and I was a devious, creative toy murderer. And unfortunately, joes broke the very best out of all figures. Star Wars guys would get a dent from a BB gun, but Joes' hard plastic would allow specific pieces to shatter off in an amazing way until there was little left of it. The right kind of abuse resulted in a glorious explosion, the pieces raining on the pavement creating a delightful symphony! It started with joes that were already very worn or broken without hope for repair. Croc Master and Zandar's upper torsos each attached to their own bottle rocket engine, their new fiery legs thrusting them skyward until they exploded. No parts were recovered. It later moved on to figures I didn't like that much, a large amount of them G.I. Joe drivers. Fires were reserved for those damned invincible Star Wars guys, so Joes were shot, left in the street and watched, firecrackered, or just thrown until they burst. I kept most of my favorites, and have since collected tons of toys to care for and protect, like a bizzare Oscar Schindler saving these little men from my own past evils. And now my final confession: I destroyed Hard Top. Don't know when or how, but I do think I may still have his gun and mic. |
06-08-2009, 10:59 PM | #62 |
EMPEROR, DARTH NAJA
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: CONNECTICUT
Posts: 2,177
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i think i know that kid... is he in federal prison on mass murder charges???
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"THE TIME HAS COME FOR THE COBRA TO RISE UP AND REVEAL HIMSELF" SERPENTOR ARMY PICS!!! http://www.hisstank.com/forum/member...tor-army-1350/ |
06-08-2009, 11:03 PM | #63 |
Cobra Viper
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Fairfield, OH
Posts: 102
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I wasn't a toy killer. I learned very early that I was fortunate to have the toys I did. Like some others, I sold most of my toys at a yard sale...to buy a freakin' NES system!
What frightens me is the amount of firepower (BB guns, explosives, lighter fluid, matches, real guns, etc.) that you guys had access to as kids to kill your toys with! Did anyone lose an eye or a finger in these toy murders??? LOL |
06-09-2009, 06:51 AM | #64 |
Cobra Soldier
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 8
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I will never forget that which began as a Flamethrower Test (I am from NJ, so hair spray and lighters were never in short supply) on some off brand military plastic toy figure, and shortly resulted in a towering inferno in my backyard, with me panic stricken and running inside to find more crappy off brand toys to BBQ...ahhhhhhhhhhhhh those Kodak moments of my childhood...
I'd never torch a good (GI Joe, Star War, Transformers) toy, only the off brand crappy ones...I had a Toy Death Code |
06-09-2009, 06:57 AM | #65 |
Cobra Soldier
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 8
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Quote:
Unfortunately I used to do this alot to my Joes and plastic model kits. I used to take some gasoline and lighter fluid and pour it into the cockpit and afterburner sections of the Sky Striker and then throw in a lit match and toss the jet up into the air and it would come down in a ball of fire! I only did this a couple of times though before there was nothing left of that Sky Striker :(
Load up the Mauler and Stingers with smoke bombs and firecrackers and a long custom wick attatched to everything and light 'em up. Really cool battle damage play but I wish I didn't do it now! Plastic Model kits were just as bad. Nascar stock cars always were getting smashed up into walls, bricks, cement sidewalks, rocks and hammers to simulate a crash in a race. Then I started lighting them on fire to get smoke and fire damage on them from the crashes. Militery ships got holes in the bottoms to simulate topedo hits and then they'd get lit on fire sometimes too. I think I've inhaled alot of burning plastic fumes and smoke, that's probably not very good! I think the worst(and now the one I regret doing the most!) was when I had the Battle Platform, Devilfish, Whale, BUGG, Water Moccasin and a Moray in a realistic battle scene in a medium size "kiddie" pool with a little water in it and a ton of lighter fluid all over the vehicles and in the pool too. Everything went up like a nuclear bomb went off, there was nothing let but burnt plastic blobs and a small grass fire to go with it. I got grounded for a month after that one, turns out my parents didn't think the burnt grass was very cool, lol. Oh yah, almost forgot. I used to torture my sister's Barbi Dolls too and rip their heads off. My sister really freaked out when she saw all of her Barbi Dolls laying on the floor in a pile and their heads in the back of the APC with a bunch of Joes guarding them, got grounded for that one too. |
06-09-2009, 07:36 AM | #66 |
Cobra Soldier
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 8
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awesome homemade battle on youtube has inspired me lol
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06-09-2009, 07:48 AM | #67 |
Canadian Viper
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Halifax, Nova Scotia,Canada
Posts: 738
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I always tried to take care of my stuff and 90% of it survives today. I lost a few weapons and there are a few broken thumbs but nothing too serious(alot of paint wear and loose joints but that was because I played with them constantly)
I had a friend that destroyed everything he had. I remember we were maybe 10 and he had the Joe RC car, loaded it with as many figures he could find and drove it off a warf into the lake, never to be seen again. The destruction wasent limited to Joe either. He had this huge Transformer( I cant remember the name but it was motorized and orange) that was put in an old sink, covered with gas and lit on fire. |
06-09-2009, 08:03 AM | #68 |
Hisstank.Com General
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Ottawa, Canada
Posts: 5,354
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Quote:
This is exactly what happened with me, once I got my air rifle. Think I was 13 or so. Killed a bunch of my favourite Joes... I was pretty careful with them prior to that, although sometimes I would carefully bite their hands to tighten their grips if they got too loose. Even so, I think we only lost one figure (Snake Eyes V2) to a broken thumb.
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06-09-2009, 08:11 AM | #69 |
Master of Disguise
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Sarasota, FL
Posts: 4,757
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Quote:
I wasn't a toy killer. I learned very early that I was fortunate to have the toys I did. Like some others, I sold most of my toys at a yard sale...to buy a freakin' NES system!
What frightens me is the amount of firepower (BB guns, explosives, lighter fluid, matches, real guns, etc.) that you guys had access to as kids to kill your toys with! Did anyone lose an eye or a finger in these toy murders??? LOL Amazingly not a single one of my friends ever lost an eye, a hand or anything else.. I guess we just had some good luck and a little common sense.
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A Gem of That Size Answers ALL my questions. Zartanman's Homemade Joes https://www.facebook.com/zartanman Zartanman's Customs on HissTANK http://www.hisstank.com/forum/g-i-jo...ml#post1084106 |
06-09-2009, 08:42 AM | #70 |
DooDoo Chaser
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Texas
Posts: 13
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F#$k No! I had to save my allowance money ( which was received if I actually studied and did chores) to get any toys.
You betcher ass I appreciated my Joes and was gonna make sure they lasted more than one battle! Never understood that whole firecraker and melting s*&t... Last edited by Grindhead; 06-09-2009 at 08:45 AM.. |
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