The Writers Block

[Flint071]

For authors posting their work in the fan fiction section of Hisstank.

If you need a place to work out some ideas, or want to hit up a fellow author for some feedback outside of their story threads this would be the place.

Let's keep it related to fan fiction, and moderate ourselves in keeping with that idea.

This should be a place for open sharing of ideas, and honest feedback on some of the posted fan-fiction on the Tank. Criticism takes many forms, and even a bad review of a story may help the author progress....and then again, the author may not really be concerned about his/her work meaning anything to anyone else.

Remember critical thinking goes beyond merely stating that something sucks or something is great - it also must be accompanied by your recommendations for improvement or reasons why you felt it sucked.

Enjoy!

At the most excellent recommendation of Lifeline MD we're going to catalog useful links here to aid those with limited or dated military knowledge. (Because as we all know, knowing is half the ...... can't do it.)

http://world.guns.ru/index-e.html

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_firearms

http://www.history.navy.mil/library/online/comparison.htm

http://worldtimezone.net/

http://www.myuselessknowledge.com/joe/index.php?option=com_frontpage&Itemid=1

www.glock.com (http://www.glock.com)

[Sgt Humpty]

An excellent idea, Flint. Subscribed!

I only recently started dabbling in writing. I'm not really aware of who else writes regularly...

[Flint071]

What's up Humpty -

Yeah, I thought I'd check it out to see who else was into writing, I definately don't do as much as I would like. But there is some great talent here on the Tank I've notied.

[Sgt Humpty]

What's up Humpty -

Yeah, I thought I'd check it out to see who else was into writing, I definately don't do as much as I would like. But there is some great talent here on the Tank I've notied.

I'm still pretty new to it. I guess the desire came from wanting to read Joe stories that nobody else was writing. However, I quickly found that you need feedback much more than with making customs.

I'd be interested in reading your stuff, if you have a link. Mine is here: Tales from Castle Destro (http://www.hisstank.com/forum/g-i-joe-fan-fiction/158126-tales-castle-destro-sgt-humpty.html).

[Flint071]

I'm still pretty new to it. I guess the desire came from wanting to read Joe stories that nobody else was writing. However, I quickly found that you need feedback much more than with making customs.

I'd be interested in reading your stuff, if you have a link. Mine is here: Tales from Castle Destro (http://www.hisstank.com/forum/g-i-joe-fan-fiction/158126-tales-castle-destro-sgt-humpty.html).

Right there with you - I write the stories that I want, and it depends very much on my mood at any given time.

Here's my link : http://www.hisstank.com/forum/g-i-joe-fan-fiction/91151-flints-loss.html

[Darkseid83]

I write occasionally, but to be honest I'm more in need of a ghost writer, lol. I come up with ideas, but I'm too lazy to write them, lol. But this is a good idea, allows people to get actual feedback about their stuff rather than posting a thread that nobody posts in.

[Spectre]

I second Humpty's comment. This should be great. Posting on the main fan fic page you get congrats and such but not a true critique. The idea of another person who is into writing, at whatever level, giving their honest thoughts on your work is awsome. If you need something to start with, tear Cobra Genesis apart.
You need to see if someone will sticky this.
Great Idea Flint!

[Sgt Humpty]

Right there with you - I write the stories that I want, and it depends very much on my mood at any given time.

Here's my link : http://www.hisstank.com/forum/g-i-joe-fan-fiction/91151-flints-loss.html

Hahaha! I read that, but not recently. I thought it was quite good. Do you update regularly?

[Flint071]

I like feedback that is more than just heavyhanded bullshit from people who have never written - someone that writes and does it well who wants to offer feedback though - awesome.

[Flint071]

Hahaha! I read that, but not recently. I thought it was quite good. Do you update regularly?

Sort of only when I get a chance.

Not so much lately.

I know how it's going to end but I have to get there - I'd say I am about 75 percent finished in my head anyway.

[PitViper]

Great thread man.

Believe it or not fan fiction was a way I used to play with my Joes. I would literally name the mission and write a plot outline then set up my figures and act as if my written outline was official paper work, I was top brass.

I had written so many little storys here and there that never left a notebook or hard drive and then I found the Tank. My 1st crack at fiction had Shockwave going back to Detroit only to find that his old partner Alex Murphy....had gone through some changes. I have no friggin' clue where that thread went.

As far as Fixer goes, I'm learning as I go. For one when I go back and read the stuff I did in the beginning the grammar and punctuation are an absolute abortion. The more I dig into writing the more that it's bothering me. I just remind myself it's only fan fiction and you're still learning.

I'm sure it's not everyone's cup of tea but I'm having fun with it. I try to write it like I was explaining to an artist what I would want to see if it was an ongoing title.

If Fixer did anything for me, aside from let me blow off steam, it gave me some balls to get this stuff off of my hardrive. I actually just put out an ad on craigslist looking for an artist who might want to collaborate and illustrate another story I'm working on.........Halloween Knight. He's much cooler than Moon Knight :)

Glad you guys are here.

[Flint071]

Truth be told I started writing Flint's Loss right after I called off my engagement to a girl I had been with for a few years. It was a way to get some demons out of my head that had been building up for months without my usual tendency to find a bottle of Gin and climb inside.

[PitViper]

Truth be told I started writing Flint's Loss right after I called off my engagement to a girl I had been with for a few years. It was a way to get some demons out of my head that had been building up for months without my usual tendency to find a bottle of Gin and climb inside.

I can't tell you how many times I used writing for a similar situation. My user name here is the title of a song I wrote for my band, it seemed a fitting name for a Joe forum. It's basically about overcoming shit.

If I couldn't vent, I'd probably get into trouble, keep writing man.

[Spectre]

Truth be told I started writing Flint's Loss right after I called off my engagement to a girl I had been with for a few years. It was a way to get some demons out of my head that had been building up for months without my usual tendency to find a bottle of Gin and climb inside.
Much better solution, sorry for your pain though.

[Flint071]

Much better solution, sorry for your pain though.

Pain don't hurt - nearly as much as being with the bitch did.

[Spectre]

LoL.... Then I'm sorry you had to go through that.

[drunknmunky]

I'm working on this one right now-
http://www.hisstank.com/forum/g-i-joe-fan-fiction/159032-g-i-joe-ruthless-terrorist-organization.html
I wanted to do a sort of ” what if” type scenario. Cobra Commander has been elected president and has framed the Joes for murder. I wanted to break the stereotype of all the characters, as well as spotlight less popular characters. For example Snake Eyes is a pill popping alcoholic who is realizing he isn't invincible anymore. Clutch has just teamed up with Storm Shadow (what?) to try and find Snake Eyes. Stalker and Roadblock were imprisoned and thrown in a cell with Mutt.
I have fun writing but it's tough to find time. I admit I don't read any of the other fan fiction on here. Sorry guys. Problem is I don't really have time to keep up with them. I had a story going (I Was There) about a mercenary who starts at the bottom of Cobra as a trooper and works his way up to Cobra Commander's right hand man. However I took a break from writing it and ended up losing every idea I had going on so I basically scraped it.

[Flint071]

LoL.... Then I'm sorry you had to go through that.

Appreciated

[Flint071]

There are some authors on here who just feel the need to list names of their favorite characters without any development or even so much as a modicum of story. Hate those.

[Spectre]

The name never makes a character but some people may feel all readers already know the background on a character.
Personally I like to develop a know character in a different light than the old story lines. To give an old character a new feel somewhat.

[PitViper]

I don't know. I love characters like Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow to death but I couldn't possibly find the "umpf!" to write about them. I mean it's been done for the last 2 bajillion years.

I'd much rather flesh out something that could actually use it, or perhaps change the fans perception on something. Which is what I tried to do with Dreadnoks. Even that was on the cusp of being boring, they're borderline too popular. What could you possibly do with a character like Cobra Commander? Hama has so many twists and turns to these guys in the early days I'd rather work on the faceless characters.

A day in the life of a Frag-Viper, the day Nemesis Inforcer was created, a green shirt and blue shirt meeting hand to hand on the battle field......Mainframe in a situation where he relies more on his USMC skills than his hacking skills.

All stuff I'd love to see but too lazy to do lol.

[PitViper]

The name never makes a character but some people may feel all readers already know the background on a character.
Personally I like to develop a know character in a different light than the old story lines. To give an old character a new feel somewhat.

You just said what I was trying to say in half the wordage.

[Spectre]

You just said what I was trying to say in half the wordage.
Lol... I love your work on The Fixer and know what you mean about it being easier to create your own characters. I just try to recycle the old ones, update them maybe without all the background twists.

[Flint071]

I went with an America's Elite Flint for my story because I thought he was underused in that series - never really showed how he got to be so grizzled.

[Van Hammer]

I've been thinking of making a Cobra's Creek fanfiction a Joe themed teen drama.Not sure if I should post it in spam or the fanfic section.

[Flint071]

I've been thinking of making a Cobra's Creek fanfiction a Joe themed teen drama.Not sure if I should post it in spam or the fanfic section.

That would have been funny about ten years ago - LOL

[Tanksmasher]

I'd love to get involved with this. I have a degree in creative writing and I have been working on some short stories, none of which I've completed yet, so I haven't shared them with anyone. I'm working on some stuff set in the Vietnam era, when Stalker and Tommy and SE were LRPs and later running recon for SOG. The problem is I don't have as much time to write, so I get into it for a few days and then set it aside for a couple weeks, and then start back up.

[Lifeline_MD]

Very cool idea, I wish I'd thought of it.

As you guys probably noticed I have 2 on the go and 1 on hiatus (see sig).

I'm too busy atm to really right much, combined with some minor writers block, though I do have one thing on the block to be written.

I don't have any formal training in creative writing, I just enjoy doing it and have read a lot of things, so I thought I'd try my hand.

Like most of you guys I also try to pick up on lesser-used characters, but even when I use the 'big' characters, I try to change their backstories to be more unique and different from what they were originally, even if I borrow some core details. I find its a good mix, because people are somewhat familiar with where things come from, but there's always a new twist to keep them guessing.

[crock master]

take some acid

http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e205/picklis/CC.png

[Sgt Humpty]

Sort of only when I get a chance.

Not so much lately.

I know how it's going to end but I have to get there - I'd say I am about 75 percent finished in my head anyway.

Cool. I'll have to revisit it later when the wife goes to bed. She's waiting for me to come and watch a movie with her, so I'll say adios for now!

[Flint071]

Later on Humpty -

[jmc2915]

is there something like this that covers non joe fiction?

[Lifeline_MD]

is there something like this that covers non joe fiction?

We don't really have a Non-joe fan fiction section.
Not sure if anyone here writes that.

[Flint071]

is there something like this that covers non joe fiction?

Talk about it here - this is fan fiction, or just writing in general.

All authors are welcome.

Me - I write a lot of letters to Penthouse too.

[Lifeline_MD]

Side question, should we talk about ideas we want to use but would like to talk out with someone? Its kinda spoilerific for our own stories, but there's a couple I'm blocked on.

Thoughts?

[Flint071]

Side question, should we talk about ideas we want to use but would like to talk out with someone? Its kinda spoilerific for our own stories, but there's a couple I'm blocked on.

Thoughts?

I am going to use this thread heavily for that very idea.

Hell only about 5% of us can actually read anyway so it's not terribly spoilerific.

[jmc2915]

i have been think of starting to write a story about a group of teenagers who live in a town called springfield and that start to realize that there is some kind of sinister force that is in control of there hometown. i think i was thinking it would be a tv show kinda like smallville bet joe based

[Flint071]

i have been think of starting to write a story about a group of teenagers who live in a town called springfield and that start to realize that there is some kind of sinister force that is in control of there hometown. i think i was thinking it would be a tv show kinda like smallville bet joe based

That's a pretty intense idea if you can capture the teen angst and a general sinister vibe - I could imagine the cameos in that as they start to peel away the layers.

[Lifeline_MD]

I am going to use this thread heavily for that very idea.

Hell only about 5% of us can actually read anyway so it's not terribly spoilerific.

A fair point. lol

i have been think of starting to write a story about a group of teenagers who live in a town called springfield and that start to realize that there is some kind of sinister force that is in control of there hometown. i think i was thinking it would be a tv show kinda like smallville bet joe based

Oh very cool. G.I. Joe vs. Cobra (If you have Joes) from a perspective outside the team. Don't think that's really been done before. Certainly not officially, and not in any of the fan fics I've seen here. Humpty, Troy, Sparhawk and Flint all write from in-team perspectives (they're the only ones I read through regularly), and the closest I've come was using a reporter for part of one story (who was quickly involved with the Joes).

Would love to see how that turned out.




Here's something I've been debating a bit. THrowing in mnore details on injuries sustained by various people. I'm in something of a unique position to be able to accurately describe the effects of trauma on the body (without going into excruciating detail), without simply saying "he got shot in the arm". I've been throwing the idea around in my head of being more specific about the effects that would have and the battlefield treatments that the person would need after, but I worry that might bore some readers. What do you guys think?

[jmc2915]

i want to get throught the original marvel run of comics and incorperate any story that involves springfield and any of the joes/cobra characters that run into those issues.

That's a pretty intense idea if you can capture the teen angst and a general sinister vibe - I could imagine the cameos in that as they start to peel away the layers.

[Flint071]

I'm working on an idea for a spin off from Flint's Loss that involves Chuckles going undercover in the Springfield PD. Hoping to get a mix of the Joeverse with some "normal" everyday occurences.

Like what happens when he pulls over an off-duty Cobra Viper and the Viper pulls out his ID. Still trying to figure out who the main villian would be - Cobra Commander is too easy.

[Spectre]

Seems like a pretty solid storyline. But at some point wouldn't they need some outside help/support?

[darkwise]

Subscribed. This forum is going to be very useful to a lot of us. I write constantly, though not fan fiction, so I will be here for advice and critiques. Great idea, Flint.

[jmc2915]

i also think it would be a good platform to explain some of the origins like dr mindbender being a dentist cobra commander being a used car salesman as his cover and maybe one of the kids dad could be a crimson guard or something

[Lifeline_MD]

i want to get throught the original marvel run of comics and incorperate any story that involves springfield and any of the joes/cobra characters that run into those issues.

I think that's an excellent idea. Tying into the existing mythos is a real plus in my mind.

Whenever I get the new TPBs as they come out I have a notebook beside me as I read to jot down small details, quotes or what have you that I want to use in my own work for a sense of familiarity.

I'm working on an idea for a spin off from Flint's Loss that involves Chuckles going undercover in the Springfield PD. Hoping to get a mix of the Joeverse with some "normal" everyday occurences.

Like what happens when he pulls over an off-duty Cobra Viper and the Viper pulls out his ID. Still trying to figure out who the main villian would be - Cobra Commander is too easy.

If I may make a suggestion how about Night Adder or Croc Master - the chief of police?

[Flint071]

A fair point. lol




Here's something I've been debating a bit. THrowing in mnore details on injuries sustained by various people. I'm in something of a unique position to be able to accurately describe the effects of trauma on the body (without going into excruciating detail), without simply saying "he got shot in the arm". I've been throwing the idea around in my head of being more specific about the effects that would have and the battlefield treatments that the person would need after, but I worry that might bore some readers. What do you guys think?

I would reserve judgement until I read something of course, but I suspect that you run the risk of alienating people if you make it too medically accurate - which I think you are thinking too.

As long as it is balances with some good story telling and doesn't read like a textbook on first aid, then why the hell not. I like realism and grit.

Bring on the ulcerated testicles...wait, what?

[Flint071]

If I may make a suggestion how about Night Adder or Croc Master - the chief of police?

Night Adder is a great idea....my mind is starting to churn with this sexiness.

[jmc2915]

I'm working on an idea for a spin off from Flint's Loss that involves Chuckles going undercover in the Springfield PD. Hoping to get a mix of the Joeverse with some "normal" everyday occurences.

Like what happens when he pulls over an off-duty Cobra Viper and the Viper pulls out his ID. Still trying to figure out who the main villian would be - Cobra Commander is too easy.

perhaps wade collins former member of snake-eyes and stalkers l.r.r.p who later becomes the saw viper who kills a bunch of joes and cobras and then later become overkill(i think).

[jmc2915]

I think that's an excellent idea. Tying into the existing mythos is a real plus in my mind.

Whenever I get the new TPBs as they come out I have a notebook beside me as I read to jot down small details, quotes or what have you that I want to use in my own work for a sense of familiarity.



If I may make a suggestion how about Night Adder or Croc Master - the chief of police?

right now i only have two of the tpb vol 1 & 5 so i have a ways to go

[Lifeline_MD]

I would reserve judgement until I read something of course, but I suspect that you run the risk of alienating people if you make it too medically accurate - which I think you are thinking too.

As long as it is balances with some good story telling and doesn't read like a textbook on first aid, then why the hell not. I like realism and grit.

Bring on the ulcerated testicles...wait, what?

Differential Diagnosis: Syphilis.

I had to :D


Yeah that is my worry. I find the stuff facinating, but how much do other people really want to know.

I do have an idea planned out on how to do a test run to gague response. I don't know if you read mine at all, but in the story "Twilight" one of the Joes is horifically injured during a mission. I forget the file name but eventually he becomes Robojoe. I'm planing on doing a bit of a medical drama on how the heck they patch him up and turn him into that.

If it goes over well I can figure out just what level of detail to include going forward. If it flops, then I know to leave it out and have gotten it out of my system.

Though if it works it opens the door to some great stories about biological weapons.

[Lifeline_MD]

Night Adder is a great idea....my mind is starting to churn with this sexiness.

He seems to have the "bad motha-fucker* vibe about him.

And the dog screams security (ie police) to me.

[jmc2915]

here is something i started but didn't get very far with unfortunately i have very little military knowledge

SOLDIER BOYZ
REAL AMERICAN HEROES

Cast:
Sgt. Lonzo R. Wilkinson (Stalker) Sgt. Wilkinson
Thomas S. Arashikage (Storm Shadow) Ash
Joe (Snake-Eyes)
Wade Collins
Ramon Escobedo
Dickie Saperstien

These Six Characters are a part of an L.R.R.P. (Long Range Reconnaissance Patrol).

Stalker – Grew up in Detroit Michigan. Leader of a local gang for most of his teenage life. At some point he turned his life around and joined the army. Is flaunt in Spanish, French, Arabic & Swahili.

Storm Shadow - Japanese American, Black hair, dark eyes

Snake-Eyes – Little is known about him. He is quiet in his movements and is a swift. While Snake Eyes served in combat, he always carried a picture of his twin sister with him in his hat for good luck. Snake Eyes is around six feet tall with an athletic build, blond hair and blue eyes

Setting:
General Location: Southeast Asia
Location: Classified
Mission: Classified
Year: Classified

Story:
While on a mission, the LRRP team walked into a valley and stumbled into an encampment of Southeast Asians regulars (soldiers). A firefight ensued, with Ramon, Dickie and Wade all being killed. (Wade Collins actually survives, and later joins Cobra, becoming Fred II of the Fred series Crimson Guardsmen). The rest of the team was able to make it out of the valley and to an LZ. As a helicopter arrived to pick up the surviving team members, the pursuing NVA opened fire, wounding Snake Eyes. Concerned for his friend, Storm Shadow went back for Snake Eyes. Running through heavy enemy fire, Storm Shadow was able to get Snake Eyes safely aboard the helicopter. Upon returning home from the war, Snake Eyes met with Colonel Hawk, who informed him that his family had been killed in a car accident (which coincidentally involved the brother of the man who would eventually become G.I. Joe's arch-foe, Cobra Commander). After some soul-searching, Snake Eyes went to study the ninja arts with Storm Shadow's family, the Arashikage Clan.

[Lifeline_MD]

here is something i started but didn't get very far with unfortunately i have very little military knowledge...
Didn't quote the story part, but it sounds like a good start on fleshing out the details of that common backstory.

As for the lack of military knowledge, I have absolutely ZIP. Wikipedia is your friend.

I've also found the following VERY helpful:

Weapons - modern fire arms (http://world.guns.ru/index-e.html)
List of firearms - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_firearms)
Comparison of Military and Civilian Equivalent Grades (http://www.history.navy.mil/library/online/comparison.htm)
WorldTimeZone - Current time around the World and standard time zones map of the world- 12 format (http://worldtimezone.net/)
JMM's G.I. Joe Comics Home Page - Home (http://www.myuselessknowledge.com/joe/index.php?option=com_frontpage&Itemid=1)

and google maps of course


Flint, since you have the first post in the thread, would you mind adding a "useful links" section at the bottom of it, and putting in some of the ones that the different writers use that we bring up? Would be easier than trying to dig them out.

[Flint071]

Differential Diagnosis: Syphilis.

I had to :D


Yeah that is my worry. I find the stuff facinating, but how much do other people really want to know.

I do have an idea planned out on how to do a test run to gague response. I don't know if you read mine at all, but in the story "Twilight" one of the Joes is horifically injured during a mission. I forget the file name but eventually he becomes Robojoe. I'm planing on doing a bit of a medical drama on how the heck they patch him up and turn him into that.

If it goes over well I can figure out just what level of detail to include going forward. If it flops, then I know to leave it out and have gotten it out of my system.

Though if it works it opens the door to some great stories about biological weapons.

Well to be honest I really have not had an opportunity to get into your work just yet, however, you've sparked my interest.

[Troynos]

I'll have some new stuff posted end of the month.

[MB Ferret]

For about a year I've been playing around with the idea of doing this in comic form with figures and then green screen with scenery/shots from games like GTA/ARMA/Raven Shield/TDU and very much waiting for European Escalation and Naval War Arctic Circle.

My expertise is mainly history and administration - two things that can be boring as hell. Unfortunately I overanalyze and overdetail things so it will probably be somewhat dry at times. I also tend to drift towards the macro view of things so from a world wide sense GI Joe may be an important part - but a fairly unseen part due to lack of size.

Anyways I looked back and wanted to find a point in time where an organization like Cobra could emerge as an influential organization and I come back to 1993. At that time you have the remnants of the Soviet Union coalescing and turmoil in the former Yugoslavia. At this point if you had some major bankroll and wanted soldiers who were already trained and trained well this would be an excellent source.

With regards to MARS - I saw MARS as a consortium made up of some of the worlds greatest weapon makers to share technology. In going thru these organizations I wanted to show some of their history as well. The Total War series with some heavy modding does a good job of showing battle size warfare - ok well as good as you're going to get these days. The McCullen Clan for instance follows a bit of the true history of the name. That being that the name was Cullen and they were an Irish clan that fled to SW Scotland. Going further I went to our good friend - Genetic Sciences to study the similarities in genetics between the Irish and the Basque. In other words - I've tried to stretch the Cullen/McCullen history back from Scotland(Middle Ages) to Ireland(Dark Ages) to the Basque region of Spain/France(Barbarian Invasions) to the Caucasus. The difficult leap is the one to the Caucasus because Basque history is kinda' tricky. No Goths or Huns or Franks to track back.

After McCullen we have the Arashikage. As opposed to a modern Ninja clan I see them as a Japanese centric family business who live in the modern while retaining the spirit and codes of the Samurai and Ninja culture going back to the Shogun period. Again Total War does a nice job of giving me tools to fill in the blanks visually here.

For the R in MARS I'm using a new fictional Rajput character bringing what it is that NW India can bring to the table - or basically India in general. That is engineering, technical, and manufacturing support with few questions asked. Again - I can use Total War to trace a lineage and a history of war.

For S I'm crossing some boundries here and including Stark Industries. At this point Howard Stark and Obadiah Stane are running the company. And so there's a backstory of sorts with their relationship. Tony Stark is pretty much a college student at this point.

Bankrolling the operation would be Extensive Enterprises. Figure at this point they could quietly be pursuing new technology to change the world and to profit greatly. The Internet. I remember 1993 - 2000 and how much information accessiblity changed. If someone who wasn't a good guy wanted to make some money what would they do... well they'd probably start up AOL if they were truely evil but assuming they're more cunning then that investment into information and control of that information seems to be a money maker.

Given that I am a database and programming fiend I also wanted to be dumb enough to have an adapting nation - and so I built an engine called Politico that has all congressional districts in the US in it based upon their demography and voting track over the past 30 years. Lemme give you an example. In Alabama Thaddeus Rosa-R is a 73 year old white Lawyer from McIntosh, AL. He's unambitious, low ethics, weak on economics, and kind of a boob on defense. He's popular enough in the Alabama 1st to hold the congressional seat but lets see what happens if he runs against current incumbant Senator Clinton Potts. Potts is a 51 year old Black former firefighter from Birmingham. He's very ambitious and pretty popular for social and economic issue stands. He's really big with the defense folks though. Assume Bama's economy is less of a concern then social issues and defense and the election goes like this: 53% for Potts, 47% for Rosa. If we make Rosa ethical and give him some econ 101: 63% for Rosa 37% for Potts.
The idea being not to delve too deep into this but to give me some idea of where things should go. I've got it programmed to the point where I have a Supreme Court, House, Senate, and a working executive branch.... and a 2 party system with the ability for a 3rd to be a disruptor. (yes I've run this for the 2012 election... Obama wins every permutation at this point)

Finally because well I don't have enough weird nonsense listed above... I have a town named Springfield I've been playing with... in The Sims 3... and yes... it is populated with a virtual GI Joe team... I walked in on Scarlet in a horrifying relationship once actually and yes... I'm writing it in sortof.

So that's what I've got... and a bazilion other ideas I can't get totally straight in my head.

[Lifeline_MD]

Well to be honest I really have not had an opportunity to get into your work just yet, however, you've sparked my interest.

That's ok. I was first off the deep end to start my own thread and keep it going for pure fiction. I admit the amount now is kinda a lot.

Honestly though, if you (or anyone else) wants to start, there are only a few key stories you need to read to be up to date:

04/24/2031 - Black Thursday
05/13/2031 - Lifeline
05/15/2031 - Chuckles
06/06/2033 - Destro
06/06/2033 - Who's Conning Who?
04/18/2034 - Twilight
04/24/2034 - New York City

Though I also highly recommend Interview with a Terrorist

[/shameless plug]

I'll have some new stuff posted end of the month.


About damned time!!

[darkwise]

I'm working on an idea for a spin off from Flint's Loss that involves Chuckles going undercover in the Springfield PD. Hoping to get a mix of the Joeverse with some "normal" everyday occurences.

Like what happens when he pulls over an off-duty Cobra Viper and the Viper pulls out his ID. Still trying to figure out who the main villian would be - Cobra Commander is too easy.


You could really explore some dark territory with IDW's Chuckles. I would definitely follow along with that storyline.

[PitViper]

So who here likes Dreadnoks?? lol

Flint, for a scoundrel you started a fanfriggin'tastic thread...this is like caffeine for the imagination.

Night all.

[MLos1]

I have my degree in professional writing, and i was an arts and entertainment editor for 5 years and i've been published more than a few times, i've also sold 2 screenplays to low budget production houses...so, i'd be willing to give an arbitrary look at whatever you guys would like to get some feedback on... from the experience i have... and give you a non-bullshit critique.

[Troynos]

So who here likes Dreadnoks?? lol
.

I fixed the Dreadnoks in my Joeverse. They're more like a Sons of Anarchy biker club but worldwide and engage in piracy as well as crimes on land.

And oh yeah, they're led by Buzzer (not Zartan).

My original Joeverse, which has the Dreadnok story started in it:
http://www.hisstank.com/forum/g-i-joe-general-discussion/61938-troys-j-o-e-verse.html

[Lifeline_MD]

very awesome offer MLos1.

Would definitely love an opinion. Now I just have to edit (or write) something that's actually up to par for a real critique.

THanks man!

[Lifeline_MD]

I fixed the Dreadnoks in my Joeverse. They're more like a Sons of Anarchy biker club but worldwide and engage in piracy as well as crimes on land.

I keep waiting to read about these guys. (Unless i missed or forgot something, which is possible)


Personally I use them as an exclusively ex-military group that now does some questionably legal activities as a registered PMC.

[Troynos]

I think I only did 2 or 3 chapters of the Dreadnoks in the original Joeverse.

[MLos1]

No problem.

[MLos1]

very awesome offer MLos1.

Would definitely love an opinion. Now I just have to edit (or write) something that's actually up to par for a real critique.

THanks man!

No problem...either way i read most of the fiction on here anyway.

[Lifeline_MD]

I think I only did 2 or 3 chapters of the Dreadnoks in the original Joeverse.

Only vaguely remember that. Must dig up that thread.

No problem...either way i read most of the fiction on here anyway.

Oh really? Glad to hear it.

Well, I can't speak for everyone, but if you ever have any comments or critiques (as brutally honest as you feel), I always welcome them in the thread or by PM.

As for your offer, I'm going to PM you something.

[Troynos]

Only vaguely remember that. Must dig up that thread.


Or just wait awhile as it'll probably get reused.

Alot of the stuff I did is still valid and usable in the new 'verse, with some minor to major editing.

So I'll have a big chunk of stuff ready for relaunch, just have to edit it. The Dreadnoks story will make it through pretty much intact.

[Lifeline_MD]

Definitely looking forward to it Troy.

[Tanksmasher]

Lifeline MD, the details are what make a story convincing so by all means use whatever knowledge you have and research what you don't know. I love it when a writer goes the extra mile. It doesn't have to be gory for gore's sake but it adds to the realism and urgency of the character's crisis. And as long as you interweave the pertinent details of the medical procedures smoothly into the narrative, I don't think it would detract from the story. As long as it just doesn't become an instruction manual as was pointed out earlier, I think it'll be fine.

[Tanksmasher]

Out of curiosity, I started reading Tales from the Cobra Wars and some of it isn't that good. In fact, some of it made me really cringe. Of course, my literary background makes me a bit of a story snob, but I still appreciate great action if written well. Black Hawk Down, for instance, reads like fiction and is an incredible page-turner. It narrates the action credibly without using cliches and heavyhanded metaphors, machismo or overly-dramatic prose. That's what I appreciate about that book the most.

But how did you guys feel about the stories in general? The writing? What would you have done differently with the characters or storylines?

[Lifeline_MD]

Lifeline MD, the details are what make a story convincing so by all means use whatever knowledge you have and research what you don't know. I love it when a writer goes the extra mile. It doesn't have to be gory for gore's sake but it adds to the realism and urgency of the character's crisis. And as long as you interweave the pertinent details of the medical procedures smoothly into the narrative, I don't think it would detract from the story. As long as it just doesn't become an instruction manual as was pointed out earlier, I think it'll be fine.

Thanks. I do appreciate an unbiased opinion on these things. I'm trying to put in realistic details from other sources, so it just seemed logical that a bit of realisim on that angle might not be a bad idea. I will try to limit it though as suggested. We'll see how a trail run tests with readers.

Out of curiosity, I started reading Tales from the Cobra Wars and some of it isn't that good. In fact, some of it made me really cringe. Of course, my literary background makes me a bit of a story snob, but I still appreciate great action if written well. Black Hawk Down, for instance, reads like fiction and is an incredible page-turner. It narrates the action credibly without using cliches and heavyhanded metaphors, machismo or overly-dramatic prose. That's what I appreciate about that book the most.

But how did you guys feel about the stories in general? The writing? What would you have done differently with the characters or storylines?

Some of the writing wasn't great, I'll give you that. I didn't notice the metaphors as much, but a lot of it was certainly chiched, predictable and over-dramatic. That said, given what it is, that's not hugely surprising, but it could have been done better. Some of the stories were definitely a lot better than others though - Skidmark's and the Cobra tech guy on the island stood out to me as the best of the bunch.

That said, the general concepts behind many of the ideas, and the characters of the storylines themselves were actually quite credible in my mind. A lot of them were ones that if written better would fit perfectly into the vein of G.I. Joe in any incarnation. I in fact intend to borrow parts from them.

The only one that I found face-plantingly boring was the one with Duke in the desert working with that resistance group. That bored me to tears.

[Viper6]

do we know anyone that could take our fiction to the presses? i write a ton but id love to put a renewed fire behind it if any real professionals in the joe world were interested in our endeavors.

[Troynos]

do we know anyone that could take our fiction to the presses? i write a ton but id love to put a renewed fire behind it if any real professionals in the joe world were interested in our endeavors.

Unless Hasbro authorized it, it wouldn't be able to happen.

[Neuspeaq]

Nice to see some of my favorite authors here, (including YOU, Viper6.) :)
I too, write fanfic, (I think;) although I'm not entirely sure of how much of a 'fanbase' I have (lol) ...
ANY and All feedback would be Greatly appreciated.
I'm beginning to see what you meant, Viper6, about the Rampant Escalation taking place in our thread. I kinda wish we could go back in time, and tone it down A LOT.
I also wish some of the more experienced writers (<cough> Viper6) could come in, and help us corral this monster lol...
Anyhoo, I'm happy to see the triumphant return of John_0515 to the storyline though.
:)

[Troynos]

Tales From The Cobra Wars was very bad. I started doing reviews of each chapter but gave up.

[Flint071]

You could really explore some dark territory with IDW's Chuckles. I would definitely follow along with that storyline.

That's really the plan, really blur the lines of him being a "good guy".

[Flint071]

Out of curiosity, I started reading Tales from the Cobra Wars and some of it isn't that good. In fact, some of it made me really cringe. Of course, my literary background makes me a bit of a story snob, but I still appreciate great action if written well. Black Hawk Down, for instance, reads like fiction and is an incredible page-turner. It narrates the action credibly without using cliches and heavyhanded metaphors, machismo or overly-dramatic prose. That's what I appreciate about that book the most.

But how did you guys feel about the stories in general? The writing? What would you have done differently with the characters or storylines?

Lost interest in Tales very quickly.

[Flint071]

Sounds like we have some pretty good writing backgrounds represented thus far.

I started in college as an English major, realized I was never going to write the next great novel and switched to business.
But I kept up with a Literature minor and focused on the American Short Story with a dabbling of theater where I did some playwriting and playwriting analysis.

Currently, I spend 75% of my day writing. Contracts, contract interpretations, performance management plans, case-studies and request for disciplinary actions. I think what helps most in my writing is that I investigate abuse cases and have to interview people and document their observations in witness statements. Makes you really consider details, details, details. I end up defending my investigations in court, so a witness statement is nothing but a story of what occured.

[drunknmunky]

I try to plan my story out but most is thought of on the fly then transferred onto paper (in this case a post). My problem is that occasionally I write something and delete it before posting. I proofread everything before posting so sometimes I hate what I wrote. It happened today actually. Wrote about Zartan and Cobra Commander and hated it so it never got posted. Anybody else have similar problems?

[PitViper]

I fixed the Dreadnoks in my Joeverse. They're more like a Sons of Anarchy biker club but worldwide and engage in piracy as well as crimes on land.

And oh yeah, they're led by Buzzer (not Zartan).

My original Joeverse, which has the Dreadnok story started in it:
http://www.hisstank.com/forum/g-i-joe-general-discussion/61938-troys-j-o-e-verse.html

I'll have to check this out later tonight.

My Dreadnoks are somewhat different then they have been portrayed in the past also. I keep Monkeywrench an unofficial leader for the most part. Zartan makes some appearances but I didn't want to get too carried away with him, again it goes back to the big character thing for me. There is already enough of that.

The thing I wanted to do most in Fixer was make them real people. Actually Tony Montana was a huge influence, a bad guy with morals.

That, as a reader is what I like to read most, history, origin, what made them so bad, good or however they are??

I had the most fun and was most proud writing about Thrasher.

Time for everyone to toot their own horn. What are you most proud of? Anything you wrote that gave you a sense of accomplishment?

[Flint071]

I find that I write the best stuff when I just feel like it - never write when you feel obligated to do so, the work suffers.

[PitViper]

I find that I write the best stuff when I just feel like it - never write when you feel obligated to do so, the work suffers.

Well said, that's probably why I have almost zero interest in being in a band right now. It was supposed to be fun, a dude's night out. You're pushing me to do stuff when it's not coming naturally because you're jamming my "escape" down my throat......and it sounds like dogshit.

What fiction influenced you most? I don't care if it's Spider Man or Sherlock Holmes--I'd love to hear your personal favorite stories.

[Lifeline_MD]

I find that I write the best stuff when I just feel like it - never write when you feel obligated to do so, the work suffers.

Same here. If I try to plan what I'm writing I have a harder time doing it. I usually let it flow. The most I ever try for is a very basic outline of how I want it to begin and end.


What fiction influenced you most? I don't care if it's Spider Man or Sherlock Holmes--I'd love to hear your personal favorite stories.

Lets see. quite a bit actually.

Arthur C. Clarke - amazing science fiction writer; best way of describing things in detail without being too wordy I've ever seen

Clive Cussler - interesting characterizations that really help you feel the character but more importantly valuable throwaway lines that are vital down the line, and ways to write a detailed battle from a perspective that conveys things without being over-omnicient.

Bernard Cornwell - great settings and making sure things fit within a historical or semi-realistic framework. Also great little epic details that make a story.

Jeffery Archer - best characterizations I've ever read.



I've read everything published for Star Wars as well, though I can't say that's really influence my writing style since there's so many different authors, other than to know how to write in continuity and tie small details of stories together. So in a way I guess that fits to.




EDIT: I also thought I'd throw in this quote I thought up since I'm probably never going to use it, but I thought it was funny:


Major Bludd felt the barrel of the Glock press deeper into his ribs, "you can't shoot me," he scoffed, "you're a doctor."

"Good point," Lifeline replied after a moment's hesitation, "I'll just bill this as an Aggressive Open Heart Surgery instead," and pulled the trigger.

[Cacadooky]

Hey guys, like what this threads about and very glad it happened, I've have couple graphic novels ideas in the works and always looking for a co-writer to help also and artist since my brother finds his job more important than my novel:)

So I've started a J.O.E. Verse comic using action figures. It's my take on the joes and against COBRA. I need some help as to where I want to take the joeverse. Oh if anybody wants to help I'm looking for a photo editor to edit the pics before they are rendered to comic form. So if anybody wants to PM me. I'm also full of crazy ideas for stories so I can help anybody also:)

[Flint071]

What's up everybody -

[Spectre]

How's it goin?

[PitViper]

Trying not to fall asleep right now...it's a losing battle.

Before I do I just wanted to get back on topic with influential authors and our personal favorites.

Peter Benchley--the man is a genuis. JAWS is probably my favorite story of all time. He fleshes out 3 very deep characters who have absolutely nothing in common and come from complete different walks of life to combat a common threat. It works on many different levels and has been redone countless times. I think the ocean is just a perfect playground for this sort of thing.....I mean what the hell is scarier than a shark attack?

Stan Lee, say what you want...Stan is the man.

Garth Ennis. This is why the Punisher rules. Every other Punisher story told wishes it couldve been told Garth's way. With Punisher MAX it gave Ennis the green light to make Castle the way he ought to be made.

Geoff Johns--I think by all accounts he is "todays" best comic book writer.

Dickens. Seriously, A Christmas Carol is f'ing epic.

[PitViper]

Having said all that, I'm dying to wrap Fixer up for a bit and start something new.

I'd very much like to do a crossover Joe Verse meets something else. I had something awhile ago that was a gentleman's bet with M.Bison and CC over a Balrog Vs Big Boa boxing match. Perhaps an "evening of sport" where the 2 could discuss business and then the shit goes down.

I'd like to explore doing fan fiction for characters who may not be on the front line. I'm not sure if I'm up to the task....yet, but I think it would be interesting to do a "day in the life" type story with say Tele-Viper. I'd like to see one portrayed with excitement and energy all while never firing a shot. I'd also like to make him just as relevant and explosive as any other Cobra character Tankers might want to read about. Having a comunications guy with a giant price scanner come off that way.....thats the challenge.

[darkwise]

90 minutes of sleep last night, though it was not intentional. I am actually doing pretty good, in spite of the loss. My mind functions in odd ways.

[PitViper]

Well after giving in to the peer pressure of the PT employees at the world's coolest damn comic comic book shop, I have just submitted my story to a small comic book company for a one shot.

I really didn't think it was worth more than showing the guy's there but they thought I should send it in and atleast get the word from the horses mouth.

Here we go.

And thank GOD for spell check.

[Spectre]

Best of luck. Let us know how it turns out.

[PitViper]

Best of luck. Let us know how it turns out.

Thanks man I appreciate that and believe me I will!

[Flint071]

PV - that's just cool.

[Tanksmasher]

So in addition to using this thread as a place to discuss and critique story ideas, perhaps we could also use it as a place to teach writing techniqes and discuss elements of style. I've taken dozens of writing workshops in short fiction, nonfiction and even poetry, and we could do something where one day a week we focus on a specific feature of writing, say dialogue, description, plot, character development, imagery, metaphors, diction & grammar, scene construction, suspense creation, etc.

Then someone in the group could submit some short excerpts of published work that they think reflects the quality of dialogue or detail that they would like to achieve in their of own writing, and if that person likes, we could compare some of his writing with the published work and discuss where he achieves the effect he wants or where he fails short.

Or we could have writing exercises, where we each write a short scene, and depending on the focus for that week, we could discuss how the dialogue or descriptions or imagery could be more effective or what we like or don't, while keeping in mind that everyone has different tastes when it comes to storytelling.

The worst thing we could do is simply argue what we think good writing is. This is incredibly subjective. And not everyone is going to like all the different styles or techniques. So rather than just critique someone's writing on my or your standards of good writing, we will discuss whether or how the writer achieves his standard, based on samples of published work that he shares to show what he'd like to do in his own writing.

In other words: since everyone has his own idea about what good writing is, we can simply help nudge him in the direction that he wants to go instead of insisting that they write in a manner that you or I prefer. This way we can respect the diverse styles and varying perspectives that each writer brings to the table.

[Spectre]

Here is something to try out.
All I ask is that you be honest.

Exert from “The Cobra Genesis”, Chapter IV- Scorpion


“I love my job.” Wild Weasel thought to himself.

“The flying;”
The Rattler streaked across the sky toward the palace defenders. Wild Weasel pulled back on the stick and the aircraft climbed. The Rattler was almost vertical and still climbing. All Wild Weasel could see in front of him was the top of his gunner’s head and blue sky. When his Rattler had reached to altitude Wild Weasel wanted, he cut the thrusters. The aircraft hung in place for just a second then began to fall back to the Earth. Wild Weasel pushed the stick hard to the left and the nose began to lean that direction. Soon the Rattler was in a controlled fall, nose first. Wild Weasel gave his ship full thrusters and the Rattler came screaming toward the ground. He pulled back on the stick again and lined up on his targets.

“The equipment;”
The Rattler was the latest assault aircraft Cobra had developed. It was state-of-the-art; completely fly-by-wire, the most sophisticated avionics, and all weather capabilities. The Rattler had a sleek fuselage, winglets with hard mounts for weapons packages, and its four jet engines could produced more thrust than the ship would ever need. It was a Vertical Take Off and Landing gunship. The two main thrusters were attached to the fuselage just aft of the pilot. On the tips of the winglets were two smaller thrusters to provide stability. Under the winglets were mounts for a variety of weapon systems. The most common being; two missile cluster racks close to the body and two 30 mm. “Vulcan Cannon” gun pods further out. Beneath the gunner’s seat was a .50 cal “mini-gun”, turret. The “mini-gun” could be slaved to either the gunner’s helmet or the pilot’s. The gun had almost 360 degrees traverse and could be set to fire armor piercing or general purpose rounds.

“The scenery;”
As he flew over the ocean, Wild Weasel took notice of the sapphire blue waters and the white sand beaches. The countryside was either green fertile fields or dense emerald forests. The mountain vistas, the centuries old buildings and now his targets lined up in his sights. “Absolutely breathtaking.” He pulled the trigger and the ground in front of him erupted into a mixture of dust, smoke, and fiery explosions. Nothing could be seen of his targets and nothing ever would be seen of them again.

Wild Weasel really loved his job.

[Tanksmasher]

Spectre, what particular concerns or questions do you have about your writing or do you just want general first impressions?

[Spectre]

Spectre, what particular concerns or questions do you have about your writing or do you just want general first impressions?
General impression
Imagery (is it clear or does it bog down)
Flow

[Tanksmasher]

I think the imagery of the Rattler's maneuvers is very clear. I knew exactly what you were trying to describe and I could clearly see the Rattler as it pulled into a steep dive. I also like the fact that you go into detail about the aircraft's performance and armament although there were some details that were technically inaccurate (but I only noticed because I work in aviation). For instance, winglets are designed to reduce air vortices and increase fuel efficiency, not for mounting weapons. Also, I wasn't sure if this Rattler was a new model because you said there were four engines instead of the original three, and you referred to them as "thrusters," which made me think of the jet thrusters on boats or spacecraft instead of turbines. Also, I wasn't sure where the pilot was relative to the gunner, because you write that Wild Weasel could see the top of his gunner's head "in front of him," which makes it sound as if the gunner sits in the front seat with the pilot in the rear.

I liked the "white sand beaches" and wanted to see more of the landscape. What kind of buildings are there? Were they the targets? I wasn't quite sure what the "targets" were. Maybe give us a close up what he's aiming at.

Hope this helps.

[Spectre]

Many thanks.
The Rattler in my story is original. More along the lines of the Renegades Dragon Ship but instead of rotors it uses jets on winglets to achieve VTOL. I called them winglets for lack of a better word. I didn’t want to use Wings as it is not a true fixed wing aircraft.
The cockpit is similar to a Cobra or Apache with the gunner riding forward. Being Wild Weasel, he would have to have some fire control, he wouldn’t be content with just maneuvering the craft, he has to kill something.
The landscape and cityscape has been described in previous chapters so I didn’t want to rehash too deeply into that, but I see your point.
"The targets" were intended as a vauge reference to any target he may be after, but is specific later in the same chapter.
This being just a small exert, it may not have given enough background for you to work with.
Thanks again, for your help.

[Headman]

All I've got so far is "The night was humid...".

[darkwise]

All I've got so far is "The night was humid...".


, which lent a certain pliancy to the ground as his shovel bit deeply into the Earth's tissue. Soon, very soon, the body would be buried, and the secret that he long kept, would finally be loosed from his soul.

[PitViper]

I love all the work you guys put up here. I think all of you are great in your own right.

I think Flint and Spectre have a similar style. Each story really makes you feel like you are just swallowed up in the scenario that they are writing. It's just deep.

I can honestly say that when I read Flint's 1st chapter I felt like getting drunk and appologizing to my old Lady Jaye O-Rings for never playing with her enough lol. It was just inspired work.

As far as what I do with Fixer. I never considered myself a "writer" writer. I'm pretty good with lyrics and I think given the chance I could write something in the form of a comic book. So that's what I did.

In comic book writing, from what I've seen first hand it's generally "Panel 1: A birdseye view of the coast line with a bunch of crap around it" etc etc.

Since I wasn;t gonna write it like I was pitching it to a comic company or explain it to an artist, I just thought I'd have Fixer speak in 1st person and tell the reader what he was seeing and what he was going through.

For me it's easier to get to the point that way. I'm not trying to be the next great G.I.Joe thing....I just wanted to create a tough character that beats on his enemy and blows shit up.

[Sgt Humpty]

I'm not trying to be the next great G.I.Joe thing....I just wanted to create a tough character that beats on his enemy and blows shit up.

Same here. I just write about the stuff that I wish someone else was writing! All my stuff so far has been Iron Grenadier themed - partly because I love the IG's and partly because nobody has ever really bothered to flesh them out beyond Destro.

[PitViper]

Same here. I just write about the stuff that I wish someone else was writing! All my stuff so far has been Iron Grenadier themed - partly because I love the IG's and partly because nobody has ever really bothered to flesh them out beyond Destro.

I'm happy you're here man. I actually just started reading your work and it's pretty damn epic!

[Flint071]

It's the good writers here that really push me forward on my work - I really need to be in a dark place to write Flint's Loss though and I just can't get there a lot of the time.

Thinking I need to start another story that is more light hearted - for when I am feeling more of my sarcastic self.

I am pretty sure that is how the Chuckles / Firewall chapters came about.

[Sgt Humpty]

I'm happy you're here man. I actually just started reading your work and it's pretty damn epic!

Thanks, man! That's good to hear. I've found that while I can make customs for my own satisfaction, it's a bit different with writing. I still do it because I enjoy it, but feedback is far more important.

[Flint071]

I have 10 days off from work this holiday - I am looking forward to writing at least three or four more chapters of my story.

The ideas are starting to swirl once again.

[PitViper]

I honestly haven't thought about this fan fiction that much since my submittal. Now I'm actually trying to find an artist to illustrate one of my two stories.

Believe it or not I actually hit up IDW just to see what the protocol was for submitting a story and how they hire. They were unbelievably cool and quick to respond.

For anyone interested in writing comic books...and this is mostly DIY and indie stuff, check this it's pretty cool.

Digital Webbing Forums (http://www.digitalwebbing.com/forums/index.php)

Hopefully with the short week coming up and surving my entire family--I'll be able to get back to Fixer and wrap up this arc for a bit.

[Flint071]

Hope everybody had a good Christmas.

[Spectre]

Hope everybody had a good Christmas.
You too Flint, and all the rest of y'all.

[darkwise]

Same to everyone here. May your biggest gift of the year be inspiration.

[PitViper]

Hope everybody had a good Christmas.

Thanks and you too...I got some good stuff and like 4 books that I dove into. Hopefully that'll help some inspiration.

[Flint071]

I think I am going on a self-imposed intervention in 2012 for the first 90 days.

If that doesn't send me into a tailspin of craziness and inspiration nothing will.

[Cacadooky]

Someone on here talked about iron grenadiers , funny thing is I was thinking the same. So I came up with a short story for them called " I am Iron grenadier " kinda like the hearts and minds comic series . Mine follows a man and how he becomes a iron grenadier. I have shot the scenes for about 25% of it so far.

[Sgt Humpty]

Someone on here talked about iron grenadiers , funny thing is I was thinking the same. So I came up with a short story for them called " I am Iron grenadier " kinda like the hearts and minds comic series . Mine follows a man and how he becomes a iron grenadier. I have shot the scenes for about 25% of it so far.

That would be me. My blog, Tales from Castle Destro (http://castledestro.blogspot.com/), features an on-going story arc about IG's. Here are the chapters I've completed so far...

Chapter 1 (http://castledestro.blogspot.com/2011/11/chapter-1.html)
Chapter 2 (http://castledestro.blogspot.com/2011/11/chapter-2.html)
Chapter 3 (http://castledestro.blogspot.com/2011/11/chapter-3.html)
Chapter 4 (http://castledestro.blogspot.com/2011/11/chapter-4.html)
Chapter 5 (http://castledestro.blogspot.com/2011/11/chapter-5.html)
Chapter 6 (http://castledestro.blogspot.com/2011/12/chapter-6.html)
Chapter 7 (http://castledestro.blogspot.com/2011/12/chapter-7.html)
Chapter 8 (http://castledestro.blogspot.com/2011/12/chapter-8.html)
Chapter 9 (http://castledestro.blogspot.com/2011/12/chapter-9.html)

I am going to be very interested in reading yours when it's done!

[Spectre]

Someone on here talked about iron grenadiers , funny thing is I was thinking the same. So I came up with a short story for them called " I am Iron grenadier " kinda like the hearts and minds comic series . Mine follows a man and how he becomes a iron grenadier. I have shot the scenes for about 25% of it so far.
You have to share with the whole class!

[Cacadooky]

Ok, well Spectre u know it will be in the same format that I showed u, but it starts out as an US army soldier on an escort mission for an EOD crew, as soon as they get there the get ambushed, every one is killed except my main character, an mercenary group member shows up to save him and urges him to join his group"Aka cobra " after reflecting on how the military has used him him opts to join the mercs, they turn him into a killing machine. Cobra organization recongnises his action and moves him up in ranking..... Then I go on to show you the stages of his progression in cobra and into the iron grenadier and showing his mind state and bad assnessessssssss :)

[PitViper]

I think I am going on a self-imposed intervention in 2012 for the first 90 days.

If that doesn't send me into a tailspin of craziness and inspiration nothing will.

What are you self intervening over?

[Spectre]

Ok, well Spectre u know it will be in the same format that I showed u, but it starts out as an US army soldier on an escort mission for an EOD crew, as soon as they get there the get ambushed, every one is killed except my main character, an mercenary group member shows up to save him and urges him to join his group"Aka cobra " after reflecting on how the military has used him him opts to join the mercs, they turn him into a killing machine. Cobra organization recongnises his action and moves him up in ranking..... Then I go on to show you the stages of his progression in cobra and into the iron grenadier and showing his mind state and bad assnessessssssss :)
Sounds good

[Flint071]

What are you self intervening over?

Drugs and Alcohol and Women - which will probably just initiate a mastubation addiction .

Fuck.

[Sgt Humpty]

Hey guys, for those who are following the story, I just posted Chapter 11 (http://castledestro.blogspot.com/2012/01/chapter-11.html)!

[Viperfang]

Has there been a GI Joe fan fiction here that is much like the TF Shattered Glass story where Cobra officers are the good guys and the GI Joes are the bad guys?

[Lifeline_MD]

Try G.I. Joe: Ruthless Terrorist Organization. That's about the closest so far.

[drunknmunky]

Try G.I. Joe: Ruthless Terrorist Organization. That's about the closest so far.

Thanks for the free advertisement :)

For those who haven't checked it out, it's about Cobra Commander becoming president. Cobra Industries has come up with a cure for cancer, thus thrusting the Commander into the political spotlight and assuring that he becomes president. The public is unaware of Cobra Industries funding Cobra (the public doesn't really know about Cobra as an terrorist organization) and only see Cobra Commander as a great inventor and politician. On the Joe side, the Steel Brigade launched an attack against an apartment complex, killing hundreds of people. Hawk, who allegedly have the orders, was put on trial and executed for his crimes. Now the public sees GI Joe as a terrorist organization and launches a manhunt to find the members and bring them to justice.

If anyone has any input or suggestions I would love to hear them. Hate it,.love it, whatever. If there's something you would like to see or a character that you like I will incorporate that into the story. Thanks for reading guys!

[Flint071]

I think we all get so enamoured with our own stories that we don't even considering reading other peoples work.

I must rectify this and check out some stories.

[Sgt Humpty]

I think we all get so enamoured with our own stories that we don't even considering reading other peoples work.

I must rectify this and check out some stories.

I would tend to agree with this statement. I'm always interested in reading other people's stuff, but I rarely make the effort to actively seek it out.

If you post a link in this thread when you update, I will always read it!

[Lifeline_MD]

Thanks for the free advertisement :)

....

If anyone has any input or suggestions I would love to hear them. Hate it,.love it, whatever. If there's something you would like to see or a character that you like I will incorporate that into the story. Thanks for reading guys!

I have to catch up before I comment, but from what I've read its been quite good. The premise is interesting, and though in some ways similar to Renegades, still novel, especially given the public backlash and there being no joes on the good side. The characterizations have been distinct, often novel, and (as far as I've gotten) consistent.

I admit the writing isn't exactly novel quality, but neither is mine after two years, so you're doing well there and will improve with time.



I would tend to agree with this statement. I'm always interested in reading other people's stuff, but I rarely make the effort to actively seek it out.

If you post a link in this thread when you update, I will always read it!


I sadly fall into a similar boat. I do TRY to read everyone's stuff, but for me its more a time constraint that prevents me from doing so. You'll notice I often comment after the first few parts of a story, then disappear from future posts because I haven't taken the time to catch up.

Take DM's GIJ:RTA, I read the first 5 entries, but haven't had time to catch up since. Or Humpty's Tales from Destro, where i've only gotten through the first two.

Best of intentions doesn't always translate into actually reading sadly.

[Sgt Humpty]

Chapter 12 (http://castledestro.blogspot.com/2012/01/chapter-12.html) of Tales from Castle Destro (http://castledestro.blogspot.com/) has been posted!

[Viperfang]

So I had an Idea for an original character-focused short story and wanted some feedback. As of now the characteristics I have for him are:
- Urban warfare and infiltration specialist skilled in parkour
- Former hacker who writes and talks in leetspeak
- Adores Tunnel Rat and Snake Eyes(never seen them in person. They are the reason he became a Joe)

In terms of story I'm having trouble if I want to write a "how I became a Joe" or "a day in the life of" story. Suggestions anyone?

[Troynos]

My problem is there isn't enough time.

I have 2 versions of Joe I want to do, a Star Wars story, and 3 properties of my own.

Trying to find time to write and still do all the reviews and news I have to do for my site is tough. So time to read other's work is virtually non-existent.

[darkwise]

So I had an Idea for an original character-focused short story and wanted some feedback. As of now the characteristics I have for him are:
- Urban warfare and infiltration specialist skilled in parkour
- Former hacker who writes and talks in leetspeak
- Adores Tunnel Rat and Snake Eyes(never seen them in person. They are the reason he became a Joe)

In terms of story I'm having trouble if I want to write a "how I became a Joe" or "a day in the life of" story. Suggestions anyone?

You could also go the route of him not being a Joe, but a Joe admirer who hacks their system, causing the Joes to come after him as an enemy, not understanding his true intentions. He might flee, not knowing it is the Joes who are after him, and get conned by a Cobra insider who convinces him the Joes that are after him are actually Cobra, and sets up your character in a battle against his own heroes.

[Troynos]

First thing that needs to be approached is:

How did he learn about the Joes and specifically those two.


Also, need to make sure don't make him too strong. If he can do everything, there's no need for others.

[Viperfang]

Thanks for the input darkwise and Troynos :)
I do agree now that I look at it having him learn about the Joes and Cobra will be a better start. Also the Joe Admirer part sounds awesome than a regular Joe. Again, thanks!

[Troynos]

Thanks for the input darkwise and Troynos :)
I do agree now that I look at it having him learn about the Joes and Cobra will be a better start. Also the Joe Admirer part sounds awesome than a regular Joe. Again, thanks!

Still need to come up with a good way of how someone with his skills learns about the Joes to begin with.

That can make or break the story. Too corny/cheesy or hard to believe and it'll ruin the momentum.

[darkwise]

Thanks for the input darkwise and Troynos :)
I do agree now that I look at it having him learn about the Joes and Cobra will be a better start. Also the Joe Admirer part sounds awesome than a regular Joe. Again, thanks!


Keep flushing your ideas out, and just start writing. Sometimes, just putting "pen to paper" is enough to get the story moving on its own. And check back here with progress. It would be fun to see where it is going.

[Cacadooky]

Here's an idea, his alias is : Backslash, a MIT student with exceptional computer skills, and not your typical nerd/hacker . Backslash is a parkour runner on his free time with his buddies. On a nice spring day Backslash and his friends go to downtown for a parkour session, while jumping through allys his friends stumble on a bank robbery. In an attempt to become the towns hero's backslashes friends chase down the robbers in parkour fashion. Thy chase them to an abandon house where they fell straight into a trap. Backslashes friends are killed, backslash makes it out but takes out one robber and notices a cobra tattoo on him, and also on another robber. Backslash vowes to take down the criminals who killed his buddies. He now runs a website dedicated to searching for " cobra " and uses his hacking to gain the attention of cobra and joes.
Breaker a gi Joe, is assigned to bring backslash in after catching word that cobra has a hit out for backslash....etc. Also thinking that backslash is on the run from cobra and joes . And comes down to breaker taking his life for backslash and then SE comes in before it gets bad and puts a beating on cobra and taking backslash under his wing for training while backslash vowes his life to breaker.

[darkwise]

Here's an idea, his alias is : Backslash, a MIT student with exceptional computer skills, and not your typical nerd/hacker . Backslash is a parkour runner on his free time with his buddies. On a nice spring day Backslash and his friends go to downtown for a parkour session, while jumping through allys his friends stumble on a bank robbery. In an attempt to become the towns hero's backslashes friends chase down the robbers in parkour fashion. Thy chase them to an abandon house where they fell straight into a trap. Backslashes friends are killed, backslash makes it out but takes out one robber and notices a cobra tattoo on him, and also on another robber. Backslash vowes to take down the criminals who killed his buddies. He now runs a website dedicated to searching for " cobra " and uses his hacking to gain the attention of cobra and joes.
Breaker a gi Joe, is assigned to bring backslash in after catching word that cobra has a hit out for backslash....etc. Also thinking that backslash is on the run from cobra and joes . And comes down to breaker taking his life for backslash and then SE comes in before it gets bad and puts a beating on cobra and taking backslash under his wing for training while backslash vowes his life to breaker.


I feel really guilty for liking the name Backslash! Pretty good concept, Caca. Approved.

[Cacadooky]

I feel really guilty for liking the name Backslash! Pretty good concept, Caca. Approved.

Guilty? It just came to me when the tanker talked about someone who is tech savvy and has parkour, it fit well, hope you can use this to help u out buddy

[darkwise]

Guilty? It just came to me when the tanker talked about someone who is tech savvy and has parkour, it fit well, hope you can use this to help u out buddy


Guilty because it is part nerdy/part awesome, and fits incredibly well. :)

[Cacadooky]

Guilty because it is part nerdy/part awesome, and fits incredibly well. :)

Ah thank u fellow Merc. Giving free advice while at work!

[Viperfang]

Thanks guys! by the way, I decided on the character's name and decided to go with Leet(1337). Will upload the background story soon based on the feedback so far. :)

[darkwise]

Thanks guys! by the way, I decided on the character's name and decided to go with Leet(1337). Will upload the background story soon based on the feedback so far. :)


Looking forward to it. :)

[Viperfang]

Okay, here is a rough draft of LEET's profile filecard style. I tried to keep it generic as possible for now.

Alias: LEET
Real Name: unknown
Specialties: Systems hacking, parkour
Birthplace: unknown (known to be fluent in multiple languages)
Bio: LEET is a vigilante hacker and parkour enthusiast who has been known amongst the internet communities for his Robin Hood-esque acts "trolling" and exposing gangs, corrupt public figures, and other hackers who harm the innocent. LEET has been known to also upload "replays" of himself on his encrypted blog gaining a cult following that support him with information. He has always been seen on his videos wearing a custom-made helmet that look like something from a cartoon, hiding his true face. When not busy exposing "evil-doers", LEET is seen on MMORPGs and FPS games trying to get game achievements or winning streaks.

[Sgt Humpty]

Chapter 14 (http://castledestro.blogspot.com/2012/01/chapter-14.html) has been posted!

I think this might be my favorite chapter since the first one...

Feedback is appreciated!

[Neuspeaq]

Check out my newly started fanfic about my favorite (2nd stringer) Joe, titled The Sleeping Sword; thanx.

[Cacadooky]

Hey tanks! Here's the first draft of a two part zombie comic. Please pm me with any suggestions or advice! Read page1-14

Infection - Folder Shared from Box - Free Online File Storage (http://www.box.net/shared/71mvrm8oiz69ece37zf7)

[Sgt Humpty]

Chapter 22 (http://castledestro.blogspot.com/2012/02/chapter-22.html) of Tales from Castle Destro has been posted, bringing the first story arc to an end!

I could really use some feedback on this and I'm open to suggestions on where to take the series next.

[Sgt Humpty]

So having wrapped up the first big story arc, I am planning to switch gears a little bit with chapter 23. I'm going to do a few one-shot stories that each feature a character. For those who have been enjoying my blog, please stop by and vote in the poll (http://castledestro.blogspot.com/) to determine which type of IG will be featured in the next chapter.

[Viper6]

Crimson cloth is taking off, with not a cautious step, rather a gritty realistic run at the world we all know and love, with an overt emphasis on my absolute favorite fraternal order/secret society ever, the Crimson Guard (obviously).

thank you for your encouragemnt, the few subscribers and 300+ viewers that drive me to do it every day.

Today I created a letters page to limit the actual story to authored posts and MUCH APPRECIATED bumps (shameless bump request) they keep the cloth on top and perhaps promote additional interest. So please save all commentary for "The Keepers of the Cloth"

Subscribe and stay tuned, theres a contest coming up and shits about to get all kinds of more interesting.

[Lifeline_MD]

Finally got back into writing again. Hoping I'll be able to put up something semi-regularly.

Anyone found a good cure for writer's block? it keeps hitting me lately.

[Neuspeaq]

I always make it a point to read as many of the other fanfics on this site as I can... Helps give an insight to others' perspectives and creative stylings. Helps in guiding me in the right direction; and in some cases, helps showing me what routes NOT to take...

Hope this helps.

[Sgt Humpty]

Hey guys, I posted a new chapter (http://castledestro.blogspot.com/2012/03/aftermath-chapter-2.html) tonight!

[Sgt Humpty]

Tales from Castle Destro Volume I - Mercenary War is now available as a free ebook (https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/140542).

[Sgt Humpty]

Fellow writers,

I am trying hard to promote interest in my fan-fic blog, Tales from Castle Destro (http://castledestro.blogspot.com/). I also love a good contest. So, I've decided to host a contest at Tales from Castle Destro (http://castledestro.blogspot.com/), with the goal of attracting more readers to the site. Here's how it will work:

On Sunday, April 1st one registered member of the site will be selected by random drawing to receive a custom figure of one character from Tales from Castle Destro (http://castledestro.blogspot.com/). The winner may choose which character they would like made.

To be eligible to win, you must do the following:
1) Go to Tales from Castle Destro (http://castledestro.blogspot.com/)
2) Find the FOLLOWERS box on the right-hand side of the page
3) Click the JOIN THIS SITE button and log in (you'll be asked to select a username and a password).

Once you've done this, an avatar will appear in the FOLLOWERS box indicating that you have joined the site. The winner will be chosen using the following, highly scientific method: On Sunday morning, I will write down all of the names listed in the FOLLOWERS box on individual slips of paper. My son will then choose one slip out of a hat. The person whose name appears on the slip will be the winner.

So hurry over to Tales from Castle Destro (http://castledestro.blogspot.com/) and join!

[Viper6]

ya know i tried to solicit subscribers with talk of a contest, and im still going to do one as i had said, not sure what though.

Surprised how few people "READ" fan fic, even fewer bring it with feedback. wish there was an open license we could write under, wouldnt that be sweet?. I'll check your site out here in a few.

as to writers block just dusted off "the cloth" today and put in a pretty healthy post. ya cant force it man gotta let it move ya.

[Sgt Humpty]

ya know i tried to solicit subscribers with talk of a contest, and im still going to do one as i had said, not sure what though.

Surprised how few people "READ" fan fic, even fewer bring it with feedback. wish there was an open license we could write under, wouldnt that be sweet?. I'll check your site out here in a few.

as to writers block just dusted off "the cloth" today and put in a pretty healthy post. ya cant force it man gotta let it move ya.

I have a hard time keeping up with updates. Usually, I'll find a cool fan-fic and be all excited, but we all know that updates can sometimes be sparse. So you forget. I'm terrible about that.

I just added a subscription to your Crimson Cloth thread so that I will be reminded to read it a bit later!

[Viper6]

hey thanks man, youre like one of three.

i need to find a way to track subscribers, wanted the contest to require a subscription as part of the entrance requirement.

i'll likely write some more tomorrow, hope youre enjoying it.

a lot of my times been into customs lately, just started doing em a few weeks back, im on my fifth one already (posted a few WIP pics tonight...er, ah today ...damn its 2 am!!!!)

[Sgt Humpty]

hey thanks man, youre like one of three.

i need to find a way to track subscribers, wanted the contest to require a subscription as part of the entrance requirement.

i'll likely write some more tomorrow, hope youre enjoying it.

a lot of my times been into customs lately, just started doing em a few weeks back, im on my fifth one already (posted a few WIP pics tonight...er, ah today ...damn its 2 am!!!!)

Try hosting it at a blog. Mine is at Blogger.com, which is by Google. It allows you to track readers (or at least subscribers) like I am doing for the contest. It also allows members to comment on each chapter you post. You can moderate the comments, so if someone starts posting advertisements or hate-mail on your blog, you just kill it.

[Sgt Humpty]

Hey if anyone else has a website or blog dedicated to their fan-fic, I would be happy to add the link to my site. Just PM me the URL.

[Neuspeaq]

I'm not sure how many readers have taken the time to Read my fanfic, THE SLEEPING SWORD, (never mind Enjoyed it,) but, for those who did/do, THANK YOU; so Very much for that. I hope to never disappoint, and if you few, you merry few have any character requests you'd like to see, please PM me, and I'll gladly figure out a cool way to introduce them.

Again, thank you so much for the support, and thank you HISSTANK.COM, for offering me such a Badass site to be able to flex my (miniature, mind you) creative muscles here...

Jose (NEUSPEAQ)

[Neuspeaq]

Bump!

[Sgt Humpty]

Wow - a month with no updates here? Here's an update on my stuff...

--------

Tales from Castle Destro Volume I - Mercenary War is available as a free ebook (https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/140542).

http://cache.smashwire.com/bookCovers/be0a756c980f635480e0f03b1c39a875a3398dd2-thumb (http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/140542)

Tales from Castle Destro Volume II - Aftermath is now also available as a free ebook (http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/171557).

http://cache.smashwire.com/bookCovers/9f2a33bdf00d5045dd2d57b7d76b1f4f1d304948-thumb (http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/171557)

Volume III is now underway and will soon be available at my blog (http://castledestro.blogspot.com/).

You can also follow Tales from Castle Destro (https://www.facebook.com/TalesFromCastleDestro) on Facebook.

[mikevoltz]

I need help. I want to write, and get some of these ideas out of my head. But I really don't know where to start. I've never been a big fan of the G.I.Joe in the traditional since. I have always believed the Joes to be an elite unit, but for many years they were a mere Mercenary group. I never applied the Joe stickers to my vehicles, and viewed them as more Ass Kicking version of the A-team. My Designation for the modern Joe team was (Global Interdiction Joint Operations Endeavour) G.I.J.O.E. a NATO Spec-Ops team. Cobra/Destro's Iron Grenadiers , I believed was cool enough to function on their own. When the movie came out needless to say I was disappointing, but my interest in Joes was renewed. As a prior service member and veteran, I want to pass that legacy down to my son. I want to create story lines and missions for his crack team of Elite soldiers vs. Cobra terrorist faction. I guess I'm just trying to figure out where to start in my own Joe-verse. I want a realistic feel and something plausible in Modern day warfare with out alienating die-hard Joe fans.

[Ixz72]

I need help. I want to write, and get some of these ideas out of my head. But I really don't know where to start. I've never been a big fan of the G.I.Joe in the traditional since. I have always believed the Joes to be an elite unit, but for many years they were a mere Mercenary group. I never applied the Joe stickers to my vehicles, and viewed them as more Ass Kicking version of the A-team. My Designation for the modern Joe team was (Global Interdiction Joint Operations Endeavour) G.I.J.O.E. a NATO Spec-Ops team. Cobra/Destro's Iron Grenadiers , I believed was cool enough to function on their own. When the movie came out needless to say I was disappointing, but my interest in Joes was renewed. As a prior service member and veteran, I want to pass that legacy down to my son. I want to create story lines and missions for his crack team of Elite soldiers vs. Cobra terrorist faction. I guess I'm just trying to figure out where to start in my own Joe-verse. I want a realistic feel and something plausible in Modern day warfare with out alienating die-hard Joe fans.


Mike - you and I have the same idea. That is the same approach I have on GI Joe: Aftermath. I want it to seem like it could happen in today's world. That is why I don't mention campy stuff like the Joe pets (Polly and Timber). And try to relate real world things like Stalker Securities and it's real life counter part Blackwater.

The thing about writing is play it out in your head like a movie. In your head you kinda have to work on the ending, then the climax and work your way back on how you will get there. Have the ending as a goal and you write your story like a road map on how to get there. At least that's how I do it.

Use things that inspire you. Books you read or movies you've seen to bring the action sequences to life as you write.

Hope this helps and good luck.

[mikevoltz]

Mike - you and I have the same idea. That is the same approach I have on GI Joe: Aftermath. I want it to seem like it could happen in today's world. That is why I don't mention campy stuff like the Joe pets (Polly and Timber). And try to relate real world things like Stalker Securities and it's real life counter part Blackwater.

The thing about writing is play it out in your head like a movie. In your head you kinda have to work on the ending, then the climax and work your way back on how you will get there. Have the ending as a goal and you write your story like a road map on how to get there. At least that's how I do it.

Use things that inspire you. Books you read or movies you've seen to bring the action sequences to life as you write.

Hope this helps and good luck.
Thanks for the Advice. I respect your opinion and I enjoy reading your stuff. I guess I only need to work out some details and get started on a story.

[LowTech]

I need help. I want to write, and get some of these ideas out of my head. But I really don't know where to start.

Don't worry about writing a story. Start small. Write out a conversation between a couple of characters. You know how soldiers talk. Take some of the funny conversations you remember and put those words in characters' mouths. Then write a little vignette about something you know - characters on the range, or cleaning kit, pilfering a QM, or fixing stuff. Then look up the details of a historical battle from any time - Rome, Second World War, US Civil War, Lace Wars, Opium Wars, whatever. Get comfortable with the course of the battle, and then re-write it with Joes or Cobra and Iron Grenadiers or whoever you want. These little exercises will get you comfortable with writing. As you go along, jot down additional ideas that come to you. Some will be good. Some will be junk. But they'll help you to get the story ideas going.

And stick with what you know. If you aren't comfortable with international finance or circuses, minimise Tomax and Xamot, for example.

[Sgt Humpty]

Chapter 20 (http://castledestro.blogspot.com/2012/09/volume-iii-vengeance-chapter-20.html) of Tales from Castle Destro Volume III - Vengeance is now up at my blog.

This completes Volume III, so watch for it to be available soon as an e-book!

[falcon_77]

Those are some great pointers for writing. Writing fan fiction is a art and one of my hobby's. You guys have some great ideas for writing, I enjoyed your story's as well.

keep it coming

[Scarlett Sakura]

I do a lot of reading on various sites is it okay if I could put recommendations of those I find that other may like.